Wednesday, June 15, 2005

A Trip Down Loony Lane

From the Brockton Enterprise today:

Man with gun arrested inside Stoughton bar


Well, clearly this story will show that the licensing requirements for the purchase and possession of handguns need to be significantly tightened. I mean if this guy can get a gun license, we obviously need more "common-sense" gun control laws on the books.

Charged with receiving stolen property in excess of $200, carrying a firearm without a license...


Oh, never mind.

Wait...I've got it! If that's the case, then it's obvious that we need to get all those "gun-happy" states like Vermont and Alabama to adopt Massachusetts-style gun laws so that folks can't buy guns there and then resell them in Massachusetts.

A Canton man, who police said was armed with a gun stolen from a...


Oh, it was stolen? OK, hold on a sec.

Ah-ha! In that case, we need to enact some "common-sense" "safe storage" laws, so that no legally owned firearms in the Commonwealth will end up in the hands of criminals.

What's that? We already have such laws on the books?

Well, gee, it looks like the only way to end gun crime is to call for an outright ban on private ownership of firearms in the Commonwealth. Clearly, the ordinary citizens can't be trusted with guns in their homes. Only the police should have them anyway. After all, they are "professionals".

A Canton man, who police said was armed with a gun stolen from a Boston police officer's home...


Um...OK...gimme a minute.

Um....

IT'S FOR THE CHILDREN! ROSIE, HELP ME!