Lost: The Ability to Produce a Rational Argument

If found, please contact New Hampshire State Senator Maggie Hassan of Exeter.

WE THOUGHT we'd heard every lame, muddle-headed excuse a legislator could come up with for passing yet another law to erase yet another individual right. Then we heard Sen. Maggie Hassan, D-Exeter, try to explain why she's a Senate co-sponsor of House Bill 802, the bill to mandate seat belt use.

"I am not doing this because I think I know what's best for anybody else. But I do know what's best for me, as a seat-belt user, for my family members, as seat-belt users, for my constituents, who've asked me to support this bill," she said.

But wait, it gets better.

'Live free or die' just doesn't belong to one set of citizens, it belongs to all of us, so one person's behavior inhibits the freedoms of other people," she said. "This is about my freedom as well as the freedom of someone who doesn't want to use a seat belt."

Maggie, sweetheart, do yourself a favor. Stop breaking the pills in half, and follow this simple three-step remedial procedure.

1. Open skull.
2. Remove brain.
3. Re-install brain, making sure the leads are attached to the proper terminals (red is positive, black is negative).

Seriously, are you even trying to understand the combinations of words and phrases coming out of your mouth?

UPDATE: A nice bit of good news!

CONCORD, N.H. -- A state Senate committee is recommending against requiring adult drivers in New Hampshire to wear seat belts.

Members of the Transportation and Interstate Cooperation Committee who voted against the bill Wednesday morning said requiring seatbelt use wouldn't necessarily prompt more people to use them and that educating drivers about why they should buckle up was a better plan.

Those voting for the requirement said if the bill doesn't pass, more people will be hurt or killed in New Hampshire crashes.

"BLOOD IN THE STREETS! BLOOD IN THE STREETS!!!"

STFU.