Thursday, November 10, 2005

Post-Halloween Scare

OK, so I'm writing the latest "Crystal Ball Chronicles" post where we take a look at today's headlines to get an idea of what life would be like if it were possible to make all the scary guns in the world disappear. Needless to say, it doesn't look anything like the land of sugarplums and honeycakes being promoted by our country's "progressive" leadership.

Recent cases in point:

Lynn, Massachusetts: Two knife-wielding men beat and robbed a disabled woman last week on her way to her physical therapy appointment.

Revere, Massachusetts: A woman on her way to work yesterday morning was attacked and sexually assaulted in the MBTA parking garage.

Nary a gun in sight, yet these women were senselessly assaulted by violent thugs who had received, courtesy of the Massachusetts Sate Legislature, a guarantee that their victims would be powerless to effectively resist their actions.

But that's not the scary part.

I was going to put up the link to this idiotic statement I found a while back from State Senator Jarrett Barrios, where he defends his record of providing for the safety and well-being of the Commonwealth's rapist population, but the link had since gone dead.

"Massachusetts has the strongest gun laws in the country, and I'’ll oppose any measure that waters them down and puts our people at risk. Too many futures have been lost already."

Yeah, I know, I could fisk those thirty-one words until the proverbial cows come home, but even that isn't the purpose of this post. Or the scary part.

Be warned! Jay, Seth, Andrew, and the rest of my Massachusetts readers - you should be sitting down for this. It nearly scared the piss out of me when I saw it (OK, maybe a few drops came out, but nothing shows).

Click at your own risk!

Remember, I warned you!

(waiting for folks to recover from the shock)


(that should just about do it)

Yes, State Senator Jarrett Barrios wants Tom Reilly's job once his hero gets elected Governor, and has his fancy website already up and running. [UPDATE: As noted below, Senator Barrios was considering a run for Middlesex County District Attorney, not MA Attorney General. He has since abandoned that goal, and has decided instead to seek re-election to the state senate. Oh, joy. - ed.] I've said it before and I'll say it again. There is no fucking way I would even consider living in this state under such circumstances. You think Massachusetts is heading down the shitter now? Yikes.

Life according to Attorney General hopeful Jarrett Barrios:

The goal is simple: no Massachusetts resident...

And remember, kids, rapists are residents too.

...should ever live in fear for their families -– in their homes or on their streets.

Yeah, it would be nice if you actually believed that Jarrett, but this is simply rectal smoke blowing of monumental proportion.

I have led the fight to ... ban the sale of military-style assault weapons to criminals.

Fuck you, asshole. You did no such fucking thing. It had been illegal to sell any kind of firearm to criminals for quite some time now, thank you very much. What you did was ban the sale of guns that look like military assault weapons to law-abiding, licensed gun owners, you lying sack of shit!



I believe in common sense gun safety laws that protect the rights of law-abiding gun owners...

Um, no you don't.

In 2004, I wrote and won a permanent extension of the state'’s ban on military-style assault weapons. These dangerous weapons have no place on our streets.

It was already illegal for criminals to carry any kind of gun "on our streets", asshole. What you did was make it illegal for law-abiding gun owners to posses these weapons and keep them locked up in their gun safes. Explain to me, please, how a law-abiding, licensed gun owner with a semi-automatic rifle in his gun safe presents a bigger threat to society than a 16-year-old crackhead with a .22 revolver in the pocket of his baggy pants.

Again - fuck you.

This year, I am partnering with the Massachusetts Chiefs of Police, Suffolk County D.A. Dan Conley, and Suffolk County Sheriff Andrea Cabral to ban the sale of cop-killer handguns (that can pierces police body armor)...

Can anyone think of any reason why he wouldn't go after your 30-30 Marlin lever gun next? After all, that particular weapon of war "can pierces police body armor".

...and military sniper rifles (that can shoot targets, like airplanes, from 2000 yards away).

OK, asshole. Show me.

Let's you and me take a Barrett .50-caliber rifle out to the desert and set up an airplane-sized target a little over a mile away, and start shooting. You can shoot 1,000 rounds at it. Here's the deal: you give me fifty cents for every miss, and I'll pay you $1,000 for every hit. Let's do it this weekend. I'm quite eager to see you back up your Sarah Brady cut-n-paste bullshit here with some physical proof.

Surely, this wouldn't be asking for too much. Unless, of course, you happen to be full of shit. So, which is it, Jarrett? Are you lying or just ignorant? Not that either reflects favorably on your character, I'm just curious. Because, you're certainly not being truthful or overly knowledgeable on matters of which you speak here.

And you think these are personal qualities that should be brought to the Attorney General's office?

Oh, wait never mind. I guess they're already there.

To quote fellow Tufts alum, Tracy Chapman:

You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so we can fly away
We gotta make a decision
We leave tonight or live and die this way

UPDATE: Correction - Jarrett "B.A. Baracus" Barrios is [UPDATE: was] contemplating a run for Middlesex County District Attorney, not Attorney General of Massachusetts.

Not that that changes the fact that he's a total douchenut - just wanted to clarify.