Monday, October 29, 2007

Some Things Never Change

Especially politically correct bullshit-type things.

As students from Strathmore Elementary School in Aberdeen, New Jersey, marched in their Halloween parade last year, something leapt out at family and friends who applauded the colorful costumes.

One young boy dressed as a cowboy was without a gun in his holster, and a pirate wearing an eye patch had no sword in his scabbard.

As parents snapped photos and chased the characters they loved most with video recorders, boys and girls dressed in traditional costumes that should have included toy weapons looked as if they had been frisked and disarmed.

The parade included a devil with no pitchfork, a Power Ranger without a laser blaster and a pint-size Batman who had been told to leave his utility belt at home.

Why, you ask?

"When you consider all the horrific things that have happened in recent years, including 9/11, I can't blame any school for wanting to steer away from anything that might promote violence," [sixth-grade teacher, Rosemarie] Nielson said.

Freakin' ding-dongs.

Flashback - mAss Backwards, October 2005:

RULE #2: Parents, Don't Disarm Your Children!

Pirates without cutlasses, soldiers without M-16's, police officers without sidearms, and swordless Zorro's will have their candy allotment reduced significantly. Sorry, kids, but you'll have to take it up with your sissy parents. It's my house, my rules.

Conversely, the children of parents who allow them to carry their weapons of doom and destruction will be showered with all sorts of unhealthy, rot-your-teeth-out crap.

And, because it's just as scary today (if not more) as it was two years ago:

OK, I know it's hard sometimes to come up with a good, scary Halloween costume every year, so I have decided to help you all out in that regard. Click HERE for my free costume kit, guaranteed to scare the piss out of any real American you might encounter tonight.

(link via Sebastian at Snowflakes in Hell)