Monday, December 13, 2004

Crime Without Guns? Who Knew?

How many times have you heard someone try to make this argument: You know, if we could just get rid of guns, we'd get rid of crime? Flat out, anyone who believes that is a delusional idiot, or a senator from California, New York, or Massachusetts.*

Now, who would have guessed? It seems an able-bodied, yet unarmed, male with violent intentions is no match for an unarmed elderly woman. Here are two more stories from just this past weekend. Note: neither of the assailants was carrying a gun. Nor were these two victims, thanks to our benevolent leaders and Massachusetts' "effective" gun control laws.

A homeless Lynn man was arrested yesterday and charged with being the bingo bandit who beat up a kindly old woman and took her $450 game winnings.

Police arrested Heath Kennedy, 31, yesterday afternoon, after he apparently was recognized from a video surveillance tape.

He is suspected of being the anonymous bingo volunteer who followed the night's 83-year-old winner home from St. Mary's on Nov. 30.


And to those who would have us simply just sit back, call 911, and wait for the police to come save us, I don't think so.

MIDDLEBORO — A man broke into a parish office on the grounds of the Sacred Heart Roman Catholic Church on Center Street early Saturday morning and attacked a woman while police listened on the emergency 911 line.

Police and church officials did not release the woman's name, however, the 911 call was played back for The Enterprise. The woman dialed 911 because a man was banging on the door and ringing the door bell at 1 a.m. and she told police she didn't want to turn on a light.

"I don't know what's going on ... I'm afraid," she said. Suddenly screams erupted and the petrified woman yelled, "Oh, God!"

The telephone receiver was muffled and the screaming continued. At this point police said the man kicked in the woman's door and grabbed her by the throat.

Police said the screaming continued and then began to fade as the woman escaped and ran out into the street screaming for help as the attacker chased her and then fled.

Police were on the scene within two minutes of the call and 20-minutes later William C. Ford was captured by officer David A. Beals Jr., with the help of a neighbor who was watching out his window.


Channel 5 has the kicker:

Ford was taken to Tobey Hospital. His arraignment was delayed because he complained of a leg injury.


Oh, you poor widdle baby! Did snookums hurt his widdle weg while he was kicking the door off its hinges, beating up that old wady, and chasing here down the stweet? Wet daddy kiss your boo-boo.

*This sentence may not be reproduced or rebroadcast without expressed, written consent from The Redundant Department of Redundancies.