Wednesday's "One For the Ladies"

I think if I was posting personals on craigslist.org 15 years ago, I suspect they'd have gone something like this.

Don't Drink? Get lost! - 25

There's something about the sober crowd and their holier than thou attitude and pretentious manner of ordering their "coke with ice" that irritates me.

I'm 25. I drink wine, scotch, and shitty beer when I'm feeling like a commoner.

Some ground rules:

- No married women. You dames are out of control on this site..
- No Fat chicks. "HE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT!!" Yes he did.
- No children. I'm referring to your personality, little girl. Can't handle a joke? Do you think sentences beginning with "So this black guy I know" are racist? Grow up.
- If you take yourself too seriously, we won't get along.
- If you take ME too seriously, we DEFINITELY won't get along.
- If you are a vegetarian, we ABSOLUTELY won't get along.
- If you say words like "irregardless" or "synergy"...first off, I'll fucking spit on you, and then I'll inform you how we probably won't get along.