Friday, November 16, 2007

Gun Control

Because, the right of a deranged stalker to break into a woman's home, drag her out of a closet, and choke her to death is more sacred than her right to prevent him from doing so.

A northwest Indiana woman shot her alleged stalker to death.

Police say 41-year-old Ryan Lee Bergner broke into the woman's home in Hammond Monday night. The 51-year-old woman called 9-1-1 and hid in a closet with a gun she had been given for protection. She says she shot him when he opened the closet door and started choking her.


1. Hide.

2. Call 911.

This woman was following the instructions of the anti-gun crowd to the letter. Fortunately, when it came time to implement step 3, she chose to color outside the lines and not go with the more "progressive" choice of:

3. Be sure to hold the phone up high enough, so the police dispatcher can listen to the sounds of you being strangled to death. Because, only the police need guns.

And, of course, what Righteous Pest Control story would be complete without the obligatory quote about the finely tuned moral compass of the deceased.

His family says Bergner was a good man.


Well, they got the "was" part right, anyway.