We Have a "Winner"

Do not use this tool as a hair dryer.

That's the winner of the ninth annual Wacky Warning Label Contest conducted by Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, the consumer watchdog group known as M-LAW. The idea behind the contest is to show how lawsuits, and concern about lawsuits, have created a need for common sense warnings on products.

Other wacky warning labels include:

The $250 second place award went to Jam Sardar of Grand Rapids, Mich., for a label on a kitchen knife that warns: "Never try to catch a falling knife."

The $100 third place award goes to Alice Morgan of La Junta, Colo., who found a very wacky warning on a cocktail napkin. The napkin has a map of the waterways around Hilton Head, S.C., printed on it along with this: "Caution: Not to be used for navigation."

And don't eat the yellow snow, either. Kirk Dunham of Seabrook, Texas, got an honorable mention for a warning label he found on a bottle of dried bobcat urine made to keep rodents and other pests away from garden plants. It said: "Not for human consumption."

But will it get cold in the refrigerator? Another honorable mention goes to Lyne Anton of Elk, Calif., who found the following warning label on a baking pan: "Ovenware will get hot when used in oven."

Past winners and runners-up here.