Thursday, July 07, 2005

LeFtY LoGiC

In the aftermath of today's terrorist bombings in London, you should brace yourselves for the cries for appeasement which are sure to be emanating from the mouths of the world's leftist (or woud that be "progressive"?) organizations. Should any of these people be in your immediate vicinity when they start in with their anti-Bush, hippie-dippy, socialist drivel, you have my permission to knee them in the nuts.

This brings me to the subject of this post, and one my personal favorites - LeFtY LoGiC. Please disengage at least half the neurons in your brain before reading any further.

Example: In order to be an anti-Bush, anti-war leftist today, you need to believe that these two statements are not mutually exclusive.

A. We need to pull out of Iraq in order to stop the terrorist attacks like the ones in London.

B. The war in Iraq is not about terrorism.


Oh, yeah, just acres of overlap there. See how that works? While we're on the subject of LeFtY LoGiC, try this one:

A. You don't need a gun. You're just being paranoid thinking there are some violent lunatics out there who might cause you harm.

B. No one should have a gun. There are simply too many violent lunatics out there.


Or these:

A. A 14-year-old girl is responsible enough to get an abortion without letting her parents know.

B. A 14-year-old girl needs to have a signed form from her parents before taking an aspirin at school.


A. A woman's right to have an abortion is an absolute human right and must be preserved at any cost.

B. A woman has no need to carry a gun to shoot would-be rapists (thus preventing her from getting pregnant and needing an abortion). That would violate the human rights of the rapist.


This next one comes from Massachusetts junior senator, John Kerry. Hey, that name sounds familiar? Didn't he, like, run for something recently? Anyway, old Liveshot chimed in recently on the court-appointed public defenders in the Commonwealth who are refusing to represent indigent clients until they get a pay raise.

A. Poor people have the constitutionally-guaranteed right to state-funded legal representation. We must do whatever is necessary to preserve that right.

B. Gun control laws that make it impossible for poor people to own firearms to defend their families from harm are necessary, "common sense" safety measures.


Leftists, don't despair. LeFtY LoGiC can also afflict the other side of the political aisle. Contrary to popular belief, leftists do not hold an absolute monopoly on stupidity and illogical thought. Case in point:

A. Abortion in this country should be as rare an occurrence as we can possibly make it.

B. The "morning after pill" should be illegal, because that would make abortions more rare.


You got any more?