Friday, May 30, 2008

Condi Rice Enlists in the Army

The Kiss Army, that is.


Thursday, May 29, 2008

Score!

Hillary Clinton just scooped up the coveted Ricky Martin endorsement.

Obama's gotta be shaking in his shoes now.


Give Us This Day Our Daily Fisk

I was gonna leave this one in the comment thread under which it was posted, but some things deserve a spot on the front page.

I got this gem of a comment from one "Patrick Orr", commenting on this earlier post about the two medical "professionals" in Gloucester, Massachusetts who resigned over not being able to give birth control pills to young teenagers without their parent's consent.

I am sure you are aware that it is Massachusetts state law that when a woman of any age asks a doctor to not tell the parents that they are receiving birth control it is ILLEGAL for the doctor to tell the parents. IT IS ILLEGAL FOR THE DOCTOR TO TELL PARENTS A CHILD HAS ASKED FOR BIRTH CONTROL.


Ah, yes. Massachusetts General Law: the universal Yardstick of Common Sense, with which everything in the world should be measured. I hardly have the time or the energy to compile a list all the ass-reamingly idiotic laws on the books in that state. Illegal sales of plastic slingshots and cranberry sauce come to mind.

this is not the issue you conservative hack.


Wrong. Parental rights is the issue.

it is not about whether a parent should know or not, since the government has decided that it is a child's right to be private,


And, therein lies the underlying flaw of your entire argument (and liberalism as a whole), the belief that the government knows best, and that the people are to accept, without question, whatever actions and edicts their "progressive" overlords foist upon them, for the "common good".

Other things that the government has decided to have been "rights" of the people include:

...the right to enslave people who look different
...the right to drink from separate water fountains, so as to be free from Negro cooties
...the right to vote without having your vote canceled out by that of a bunch of uppity womenfolk
...the right to go to prison for consuming alcohol

Now, tell me, where does this "child privacy" argument stop? At what point does a child no longer have the "right to be private"? Would you argue that underaged children have the right to seek breast augmentation surgery without their parents' knowledge or consent? How about a good old-fashioned genital piercing?

I won't even bother to ask where you stand on allowing underaged girls to get abortions without parental notification.

If standing up for the rights of parents to raise their children with minimal interference from the government makes me a "conservative hack", then I will wear that appellation with pride. Better that than a mindless, liberal slave to the collectivist Establishment.

...but rather the issue is what the most effective way to stop the pregnancies is, and in this case offering (not without validation and counceling) birth control is the most effective means.


Explain to me the difference between remembering to take a pill every day and remembering to put on a condom before having intercourse. If the Boston Globe survey I cited earlier is even close to being accurate, then I have to call into question your definition of "most effective".

Are you arguing that a 15-year-old girl can be trusted to take her pill every day, without fail, but that a 15-year-old boy cannot be trusted to put on a condom before sex?

I'd argue that neither group possesses the maturity or sense of responsibility need to make these decisions. If you feel differently, please let me know, because to see double standards coming from such a "progressive" as yourself would really be a first.

Not.

If availability of birth control was the key to reducing teen pregnancies, we wouldn't be having this discussion in a country where condoms are as readily available (and as affordable) as a pack of baseball cards.

Putting birth control pills in the hands of a young teenager and sending her on her way, thinking you've just prevented her from getting pregnant, is to deny reality and logic the opportunity to enter into equation.

it is disgusting that some idiot (You) who knows nothing about the issue and refuses to investigate more can go ahead running their mouth when they are so uninformed.


What's "disgusting" is how ready and willing some "idiots" (you) are to surrender their personal responsibility and individual sovereignty to the State, and expect the rest of us to be OK with it when the State comes to take ours by force.

And, hey, if you think "investigating" the issue is what we all need to be doing, start by investigating who these guys are who are raping out underaged daughters.

Last up, for 50 bonus points, try to guess how many kids our friend Patrick has. I guessing (and hoping) the answer is zero.


Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Mmmm...Tuna Cake


This Just In!

Drinking a quart of ice cream is not necessarily beneficial to one's health.

Gee, you learn something new every day.


Win a Sig P250

Contest ends Saturday.


Make It Stop!

February 2008:

Comedian and actress Rosie O’Donnell wants to return to television in a sitcom about three best friends that would co-star "The Nanny’s" Fran Drescher.


May 2008:

HOLLYWOOD - Beloved TV comedy stars Rosie O'Donnell and Fran Drescher are developing a new sitcom about two women coping with midlife crises.

The two pals hope to star in The New Thirty.


The New Thirty: The new waterboarding.

Drescher, who struck TV gold in The Nanny, says, "We play old high school friends who live in the same building in Manhattan, but we're living very different lives."

The actress tells Life & Style magazine, "It's kind of Sex and the City but we ain't getting any!


Well, at least, it will that believable element working in its favor.

(link via Ace)


Tuesday, May 27, 2008

More Invaluable Research

From the Department of No Shit, Sherlock at the University of New Hampshire comes this earth-shattering eye-opener:

UNH Study: Parental Involvement Boosts Student Achievement

DURHAM, N.H. -- University of New Hampshire research shows that students do much better in school when their parents are actively involved in their education.


Who could have guessed?


Quote of the Day II

From Kaveman, commenting on this post at Breda's place:

Feeling safe is like being safe, only different.


PSH: Pants-Shitting Hoser

Via Jeff at Alphecca:

Mayor David Miller wants to close recreational shooting ranges in Toronto, along with giving the city power to block gun manufacturers and wholesalers from opening new plants or warehouses.

“Nobody can deny that hobby directly results in people being shot and killed on the streets of our city,” Miller said of sport shooting yesterday, amid debate on a possible gun bylaw.


All those drunk-driving deaths?

NASCAR did it.

Stabbing deaths?

That one's a toss-up between cooking shows and Olympic fencing.


What's Worse?

Obama pulling something like this out of his ass on Memorial Day?

Or that it will be reported on as Gospel by his subservient lapdogs in the media?

UPDATE: Video clip via NewsBusters...



UPDATE II: Apparently, it was his great-uncle, and it wasn't Auschwitz, it was the Ohrduf camp.

Still wouldn't vote for the empty clown costume for all the money at Harvard, but it's nice to get that cleared up.


Good Riddance

A small victory for common sense and parental rights in Gloucester, Massachusetts.

GLOUCESTER (AP) ― Two top officials at Gloucester High School's health center have resigned in a fight over contraceptives distribution.

Medical Director Dr. Brian Orr and chief nurse practitioner Kim Daly support confidentially giving contraceptives to students. They were outraged about resistance from Addison Gilbert Hospital and resigned Friday.


How dare anyone resist their "progressive" agenda and their efforts to give kids drugs without their parents' notification or consent! What kind of world are we be living in, when we can't even trust our government-run schools to give our children body-altering chemicals without our knowledge?

Seriously, these are the same hacks who will have your kids dragged out of school in handcuffs, facing felony drug charges, if you send them to school with a headache and two Advils in a Zip-Loc sandwich bag.

At least, these two did the right thing and resigned. I wonder how many parents in the area will be looking for a new pediatrician for their kids this week.

I know I'd be one of them.

UPDATE: From the Boston Globe (5/26/08):

Oops! Did I remember to take my pill?

Contraception experts have long known that even couples who want to avoid pregnancy can be strikingly lax about actively preventing it. This month, a survey from the Guttmacher Institute, a top think tank on reproductive issues, casts new light on the whys and why nots.

[...]

The report found that nearly two-fifths of women on the pill miss their daily dose at least once in the course of three months, raising their risk of pregnancy...


And, they're talking about 18 to 44-year-old women, not under-aged teens. I can only imagine what those numbers would look like.

The idea of handing out birth control pills to any minor who asks for them is just beyond ridiculous. Doing so without the consent of the girl's parents should be a criminal act.

I'm with NES member Martlet on this:

Let me catch someone giving oral contraceptives to my teenage daughter without my permission. It won't be pretty.


UPDATE II: Quote of the Day comes from Dr. Non Sequitur, himself.

"What parent, what teen, what adult wouldn't want us to institute a program where we're reducing sexual activity, reducing the initiation of having sex, reducing the number of sexual partners and reducing teen pregnancies," he said.


From Chapter 7 of the "Obfuscation for Bureaucratic Dummies Handbook":

When you find yourself having to publicly defend your flawed belief system, throw out a load of meaningless rhetoric that has nothing to do with your actual agenda.


Boobs of a feather...


No Contest

Marko asks: What’s the absolute worst book you’ve ever read?

That's a no-brainer. It's the only children's book I've ever tossed in the garbage after reading it just once to my kids. It's that bad.

The Rainbow Fish by Marcus Pfister

I'll let the eight pages of 1-star reviews at Amazon speak for themselves.


Monday, May 26, 2008

More Than Words


NLB Memorial Day Sale

Get these stylish bumper stickers for $1.00 each when you buy 10 or more.


Send payment via PayPal to the e-mail address at the bottom of the right-hand sidebar, and specify which stickers you want.

Offer valid until I say otherwise.


Sunday, May 25, 2008

Yikes!

CNN: Boeing 747 splits in two on take off

BRUSSELS, Belgium (AP) -- A large cargo plane crashed at the end of a runway and split in two while trying to take off Sunday at Brussels airport, authorities said.


I hate when that happens.

"The plane is very seriously damaged," [Brussles Airport spokesman Jan Van der Cruysse] said.

(AP photo)

Fair assessment, I'd say.


Why Not?

Def Leppard and Tim McGraw - together at last.


Saturday, May 24, 2008

No Additional Commnentary Required



(via Hot Air)


Friday, May 23, 2008

...With Liberty and Justice For All...um...Cubans

If only Barack "We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times" Obama would adopt a similar policy toward the Unites States of America.

"My policy toward Cuba will be guided by one word: 'libertad,' " he said, using the Spanish word for liberty at an event celebrating Cuban Independence Day in Miami, Florida.


UPDATE: Needless to say, when Obama says, "We can't drive our SUVs ... as much as we want...", he's not including the Obama family in his definition of "we".


Can't Spell "Maxine Waters" without M-A-R-X-I-S-T

Wow.

Not the brightest bulb on the tree, either.


Must Have Been One Small Car

AP: Car full of weapons lands US soldier in Mexican jail

EL PASO, Texas (AP) — When he crossed the U.S.-Mexico border, Spc. Richard Torres was carrying a small arsenal in his car: an AR-15 assault rifle, a .45-caliber handgun, 171 rounds of ammunition, several cartridges and three knives.


It's amazing the guy could even see out the back window with that arsenal piled up as high as it was. And, I guess that means I've got half a carload of weapons on my person right now.

Eeeek!


Thursday, May 22, 2008

Barack Obama, Freedom Fighter

Literally.

Pitching his message to Oregon's environmentally-conscious voters, Obama called on the United States to "lead by example" on global warming, and develop new technologies at home which could be exported to developing countries.

"We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times ... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK," Obama said.

"That's not leadership. That's not going to happen," he added.


Stick it in your ass, Comrade.

If I wanna drive my V-8 truck up the road to Burger King, buy half a dozen Triple Whopper combos, leave the truck idling in the driveway when I get home, eat dinner inside with my thermostat jacked up to 95, and chase my last mouthful of fries with a double-shot of liquefied trans fats, guess what?

a. I'm gonna.
b. There isn't a f***ing thing you can do about it.
c. I won't give a gopher's busted butt if I offend some Belgians' delicate sensibilities in the process.


Watch This Space

I've got a stellar PSH-laden bit forthcoming right here.

UPDATE: This is from The Morning Show With Mike and Juliet. I just happened upon this clip, as the wife left the TV tuned into FOX to watch their American Idol coverage this morning.

(side note: Thank God that annoying Arugula kid didn't win)

There's some beautiful commentary a little more than three minutes in from their panel of "experts" discussing Drew Peterson's recent arrest on felony gun charges. I'd offer more commentary on the "brilliance" of Jeanine Pirro, but I'm not sure, given the way things are today, if the term "stupid cow" is racist or not.



My standard apology for the crappy quality video applies, as does my money-back guarantee for anyone dissatisfied with it.


How Did I Miss This One

You all remember our good friend, New Hampshire State Representative Nickolas Levasseur, the irrationally anti-gun Obama cultist who likes to stalk and kill Republicans in his spare time.

Well, it turns out he's also the President of the Student Government Association at UNH-Manchester, an organization that's found itself in a little bit of trouble with the University as of late.

UNH-Manchester Student Government Suspended

MANCHESTER, N.H. -- The Student Government Association at the University of New Hampshire-Manchester has found itself locked out of its offices.

University Dean Kristin Woolever said school officials recently discovered the 16-year-old association may not have been chartered properly.

She said she shut down the group May 1 because it was wrongly allowing part-time students to run for office.

Association officers said Woolever is actually concerned about students speaking their mind.


Money quote:

President Nickolas Levasseur said the association loudly opposed the university's requiring students without health care coverage to buy $1,400-a-year policies through the school.


But, I thought the idea of forcing people to purchase health care coverage, whether they want it or not, was at the pinnacle of "progressive" health care policy?

Perhaps, what "Rep. Nikoli" has a problem with is the fact that the University isn't planning on extorting money from the wealthier residents of Durham and Manchester, to pay for it, instead.

Because that would be the most "fair" way to do it.


Wednesday, May 21, 2008

God Bless New Hampshire

Have I mentioned before that I love this state?

EPPING – The owner of Joker Fireworks Inc. has moved one step closer to opening the first fireworks retail store in Epping.

Selectmen voted Monday night to allow the town administrator to sign off on a permit allowing the sale of permissible fireworks as soon as Joker Fireworks has the necessary approvals from the building inspector and state Fire Marshal.

[...]

Selectmen expressed no concern about the sale of fireworks and no neighbors turned out to speak against the plan last night.



My Kids Crack Me Up

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting cow.

Interrupting...

Moooooo!!!


Getting Ready

It would stand to reason that if you're planning on playing the "We Wuz Cheated" card in November, you'll want your PR people to start laying the groundwork as early as possible.


Barack Obama the Gunslinger?

Well, he's slinging something.

"I believe in the Second Amendment...


No.

No you don't.

You believe in the liberal, collectivist version of the Second Amendment. You would have the American public believe that our Founding Fathers went out of their way to ensure that the new government of the United States would have the "right" to maintain a monopoly on the dispensation of deadly force over a weaker, disarmed citizenry.

Four words: Cold. Dead. Hands. Bitch.

...and if you are a lawful gun owner in this state...


...having complied with all the new gun control laws I plan on signing as President, including some "reasonable regulations" I have in mind, patterned on Washington DC's "common sense" gun ban and New Orleans' wholesale confiscation of lawfully-owned firearms.

...you have nothing to fear from the Obama administration.


Just as soon as your "re-education" is complete and you're all transformed into mindless, collectivist automatons like the throngs of people already I've already got worshiping at the Altar of Hope and Change.

I think people have a right to bear arms...


And, I think you're a lying whore.

But, then again, you've received more endorsements from known terrorist organizations than either of your opponents, so what do I know?


Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Happy Birthday, Buddy

Finn turned one today.



Here's his "cake" (a can of tuna covered with Cheese Wow).



(note to self: bring extra bags on tomorrow morning's walk)


Understanding The Massachusetts Mentality

A 12-Step Program

Step 1: Vote for any and all candidates with a (D) after their names.

Step 2: Feeeeeeeel good for being so "progressive".

Step 3: Watch the power of government expand, while your individual liberties and the people's right to live their lives as they see fit, free from burdensome governmental intrusion, dwindle away.

Step 4: Watch violent criminals and child molesters get released from prison early (if they're even incarcerated in the first place), while more laws get passed to penalize and make life more difficult for the law-abiding.

Step 5: Watch drug dealers peddling their wares in the open, while your Attorney General is busy issuing press releases vowing to prosecute small business owners who dare to sell cranberry sauce to their neighbors on Thanksgiving morning.

Step 6: Watch the cost of doing business in the private sector skyrocket, while the hacks feeding at the public trough keep on double-dipping into the taxpayer-subsidized pension system.

Step 7: Watch the elected leaders of the Commonwealth promise taxpayer-funded healthcare and college tuition to illegal aliens, while they dream up new and exciting ways to increase the tax burden on hard-working America citizens.

Step 8: Watch your cost of living go up, while your quality of life goes down.

Step 9: Pick up the Boston Globe and read yet another news story about the Commonwealth losing population.

Step 10: Clamp hands tightly over your ears and whine "What can we do to stop this?" as loud as you can.

Step 11: Blame __________ (insert Republican of your choice).

Step 12: Repeat, ad nauseum.


Another "Only One Professional Enough"

This one comes out of New Bedford, Massachusetts:

A firearms instructor in southern Massachusetts has been assigned to other duties after his gun accidentally went off while he was teaching a class on weapons safety.


Uh-huh.

I just "went off".

Bad gun.

Officials say the Glock handgun discharged while Maj. Donald Lamar was demonstrating to Bristol County deputy sheriffs how to safely holster the weapon.


Yep, the handgun just up and "discharged". I hope it will be appropriately disciplined. Maybe a diet of cheap range ammo for a month. No more Hydra-Shoks for you until you learn to behave, Mister!

The bullet ripped a hole in Lamar's pants but missed his leg and foot.

Sheriff Thomas Hodgson says the officer made a "gross error in judgment" by not emptying the weapon before the class last week.


Ya think?


King of the Hill

Nice going, kid.

BOSTON (AP)—Jon Lester has survived cancer and pitched a World Series clincher for the Boston Red Sox.

Now he can add a no-hitter to his already amazing list of accomplishments.

The 24-year-old lefty shut down Kansas City 7-0 Monday night for the first no-hitter in the majors since Red Sox rookie Clay Buchholz threw one last September.


Monday, May 19, 2008

Common Sense Tire Repair Tool Control, NOW!

All I can say is it's a good thing no one involved in this incident had access to a gun. Someone could have been hurt.

A city man is being held on attempted murder, assault and robbery charges by Merrimack Police after allegedly stabbing a Merrimack man last night inside the man's apartment.

Michael W. Teeple, 35, of Mast Road in Manchester, entered the man's Loop Road apartment demanding money as he reportedly attacked his victim repeatedly using a tire rasp.

Police said he stabbed the 50-year-old victim, whose name was not released last night, at least seven or eight times in the neck, head, back, arms and hands.


Of course, what the story doesn't say, is whether it was a standard T-grip tire rasp (l) or one of those assault tire rasps (r) with the evil, black plastic pistol grip, which allows for rapid-fire spray-stabbing from the hip.



Now, let's do the right thing and ban the civilian possession of tire rasps. Unless you're in the tire repair business, there's simply no excuse for anyone to own such a dangerous and violent implement.


Here, This'll Help

For all the ideologically-blinded idiots who are at a loss to explain why Massachusetts continues to lose population [read: the portion of which that pays into the system more than it takes out], and somehow think that better marketing is all that's required, might I suggest this new ad campaign.

Welcome to the "New and Improved" Massachusetts:
Now, with sex change operations for seven-year-olds!


Link here.

And, thanks to RomneyCare [read: taxpayer-subsidized healthcare for illegal aliens and multi-generational welfare abusers] being the law of the land, guess who gets to pay for 'em.

Link via reader and commenter Matt, who asks:

What the HELL is in the water in mAssachusetts??!!!


Hope and ChangeTM, my friend. Hope and ChangeTM.

UPDATE: Relax, folks, everything's OK. Upon re-reading the article, it turns out the good doctor is only going to be pumping these seven-year-olds full of body and mind-altering drugs. They can go under the knife once they turn 18.

Massachusetts: Where 37-year-old women can't be trusted to carry a gun to protect themselves from rapists, but 7-year-old girls can make the informed decision to put body-altering chemicals into their bodies.


Quick Show of Hands

How many of you think today's liberal-infested Hollywood is capable of re-making Red Dawn and not having it suck copious quantities of ass?

On the other hand, if a miracle of miracles occurs, and they do it the way it should be done (terror-crazed Islamic extremists attempt to invade Bitter America and get their asses handed to them), how many box office records would it utterly demolish?


I'm Barack Obama...

and I approved this message I'm a hypocritcal wussbag.


Quote of the Day

White County (TN) Sheriff Oddie Shoupe:

"I'm afraid that if Mr. Gurtley had not been armed, he would be the one dead.


A perfectly acceptable scenario in Barack Obama's eyes.

Just part of the price we're expected to pay to live in a society where decent, law-abiding citizens are wholly dependent on the benevolence of a socialistic government for their personal safety and physical (and emotional, spiritual, economic, etc.) well-being.

It's simple. Some of us will have to allow ourselves to be killed off by predatory scumbags...for the "common good".

How can anyone argue against such a "progressive" viewpoint?

(link via Kim du Toit)


More Mass. Mentality

Boston Herald: Hate crime spike vs. gays spurs DA to act

A spike in the number of reported hate crimes against gays, lesbians and transsexuals in Suffolk County spurred District Attorney Daniel Conley to urge the Governor and the State Legislature to loosen the Commonwealth's onerous gun control laws, and to make it easier for members of the gay community to defend themselves from those who seek to cause them grievous bodily harm, based solely on their sexual orientation.


Just kidding.

Conley's "solution" was to open up a new slot on the Commonwealth's taxpayer-funded payroll by appointing a "victim-witness advocate" for the gay community - a person whose job it will be to interact with victims of and witnesses to hate crimes...AFTER THE VIOLENT CRIME HAS ALREADY TAKEN PLACE.

A spike in the number of reported hate crimes against gays, lesbians and transsexuals in Suffolk County spurred District Attorney Daniel Conley to appoint the DA office’s first victim-witness advocate for the community last week.


In Massachusetts, that's called crime prevention.

Conley said he’s committed to making his office open to all. “We’ve come a long way in realizing that the LGBT community needs better representation in law enforcement,” he said. “We want people to know that this office is a welcoming place motivated by service to victims.”


Because providing taxpayer-funded services to victims is far more "progressive" a solution than helping them not become victims in the first place.

Who would ever want to move out of a place governed by such enlightened thinkers?


Sunday, May 18, 2008

From the "Not Getting It" Hall of Fame

Boston Globe: At a loss

That's putting it mildly.

Massachusetts is losing many of its native sons and daughters to other states and is having a harder time attracting transplants than the vast majority of the country.

[...]

Massachusetts is the country's ninth worst in attracting residents from other states, the study shows. It ranked 48th in terms of losing residents to other states.


Here's what the "experts" have to say on the matter.

"The problem is that we just can't get people to come to Massachusetts as much as they want to leave," said Andrew Sum, the center's director and author of the report. "We need to start asking what we can do to make Massachusetts a more desirable place to live, why people don't want to come here to live."


NO!

NO!

WRONG!

You don't need to "start asking" anyone anything, Andrew!

You need to start LISTENING!

Plenty of folks, myself included, have been talking about this for years. Most of the people who choose to stay in Massachusetts do not even want to hear what the problem is, let alone do something about it. Solving the problem would shatter their illusion of life in a socialist/totalitarian paradise ruled solely by liberal, sorry, "progressive" Democrats.

"We're looking forward, not backward," [Mark A. Sullivan Jr.] said. "The challenge is not to look at the historical numbers but to devise the programs that will retain the individuals in the Commonwealth."


WOW! These people are BEYOND clueless!

It's been the "devising of government programs" that's been causing people to leave the state in droves all these years.

"Oh crap, the boat's leaking! Hand me that drill so I can put some drain holes in the hull."

Then again, I'd expect nothing less from the "executive director of Citizens for Citizens, an antipoverty agency in Fall River".

Naturally, the Governor's office is in "spin cycle" mode over this.

Officials in Governor Deval Patrick's administration say they are working to give residents more reasons to stay.

Since the administration took power in 2007, the state has gained 20,000 jobs, the average price of single-family homes has dropped about 10 percent...


Last week, the problem of declining home values was a national crisis, the blame for which was being placed on the Bush administration. Go figure.

And, here's a riddle for you.

Q: How can you tell you're reading the Boston Globe

Others are less concerned about the cost of living than they are about the left-leaning politics of Massachusetts.


I guess that depends on one's definition of "leaning".

Derek Hoskins, 34, prefers to spend $650 in gas a month to commute from his home in Rindge, N.H., to his office in Northborough. He doesn't want to bother with the taxes, gun laws, and other regulations that distinguish life in Massachusetts from New Hampshire.

"When I drive across the border into New Hampshire, I feel as if a weight has been taken off my shoulders," said Hoskins, who moved from Fitchburg last year. "I no longer have a state government that wants to dictate what I do."


What a bitter man.

All I can say is GOOD LUCK to all of you still living down there.

You're going to need it.

That, and a U-Haul.


Bad Bystanders!

What were these people thinking?

LOS ANGELES—A man with a semiautomatic rifle opened fire at a church festival Saturday, wounding his ex-wife and two bystanders before several festival-goers grabbed him, wrestled his gun away and held him for police, witnesses and authorities said.


Have these people not been paying attention? Have they all misplaced their copies of "The Self Defense For Liberals handbook"? Everyone knows you're supposed to comply with your attackers wishes and let him do whatever he pleases.

The proper "progressive" response in situations such as this is to call your government for help and wait patiently for your turn to be a victim. How are we ever going to create an entire generation of hapless, limp-wristed wards of the State with these disrespectful, rabble-rousing vigilantes carrying on like that?

Let's get with the program! Future displays of courage, personal responsibility and genuine, selfless compassion for others will not be tolerated.

Hope and change, people!!!

Sempelsz said another church volunteer grabbed the man and began struggling for the gun, a .22-caliber rifle made to look like an M-16 assault rifle. The shooter managed to point the weapon at that man's face, Sempelsz said, before he jumped in to help and they managed to wrestle it away.


Stay tuned for the PSH-laden press release from the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Ownership, railing against the easy availability of these "subcompact, cop-killer assault bullets" that can be purchased at Wal-Mart for less than three cents each.

They'll call it the "new bullet of choice" for crazed shooters.

I'd put money on it.


Saturday, May 17, 2008

A Little Something For My Vegan/PETA Readers

How soon before these are banned in Massachusetts?

(link via reader Jim)


What's Wrong With This Headline?

Fox 25 (Boston): Teen Facing Charges After Car Surfing Accident


Word of the Day

Implacable (adj.): see "liberal Democrats"

1996: You don't need to have any military experience to be an effective and competent Commander in Chief.

2004: It's important that the President be someone with actual military experience, someone who knows the horrors of war.

2008: People with too much military experience should not be elected president.

You people do realize how utterly moronic you sound when you spew forth this kind of nonsense, don't you?

Something tells me that if Barack Obama selects as his running mate someone who served in the military, we will immediately find out just what is the "perfect amount" of military experience that a candidate should have.

Until 2012, of course, when the next version comes out.

Also, from the article linked above:

"But now McCain is running for a higher office. He's running for commander in chief, and our Constitution says that should be a civilian," [Sen. Tom Harkin, D-LA] said.


Wow, a career politician and liberal Democrat mangling the meaning of the Constitution.

Now, there's a first.

The Constitution makes no recommendations as to what kind of person "should" be elected president. It simply lists the requirements a person must meet (citizenship, age, residency) in order to be eligible to hold the office, and states that the President shall not receive any other federal or state government salary during his term.

For Harkin to imply that somewhere within Article II - The Executive Branch is the suggestion that those with military experience should not be elected president shows a severe lack of understanding of the Constitution, and the principles delineated therein, that he has sworn to support and defend.

Either that, or he's simply lying to his constituents and doesn't give a shit.

But, hey, what's more important? Respecting the Constitutional principles upon which our country was founded, and speaking truthfully to the American people about the same, or blatantly distorting the meaning of the Constitution to serve your partisan purposes and to besmirch a Republican candidate?

UPDATE: In Harkin's defense, he did endorse Dean over Kerry in 2004, so he's at least consistent in the "military experience" department.


Friday, May 16, 2008

Ruger LCP Range Report - Cliff Notes Version

Was out and about the other day with some free time, so I dropped by the Manchester Firing Line to put a box of ammo through the LCP. Yeah, I know...ABOUT TIME!

- Much more comfortable to shoot than the Kel-Tec P-3AT
- No FTF's to report
- Recoil pretty much as expected, not bad
- Trigger much better than expected
- Definitely accurate to within Minute of Goblin

If you're in the Manchester area and want to try one out, the Firing Line has one available to rent, though it's an earlier model that has not had the frame modification taken care of yet.

Another "Two Thumbs Up" product from Ruger.


Liberal Double Standard of the Day

Deval Patrick, governor of a state with some of the most bigoted and discriminatory gun laws in the country, speaking on the recent California Supreme Court decision legalizing same-sex marriage in that state:

"Our experience in Massachusetts has taught us that whenever we affirm the right of people to come before their government as equals, we all win," Patrick said. "I congratulate the California court for upholding that principle."


Screw you, pal. You wouldn't recognize true equality for all citizens if it fell from the sky in a blazing ball of molten lava and bit your dick off.

Also from that article:

"We're going to do everything we can to make sure that people focus on and see what we have here in Massachusetts, and that marriage equality is good, and it's good for same-sex couples, and it's good for the Commonwealth," said Marc Solomon, the executive director of MassEquality, a leading group in support of gay marriage. "It's important that people take a close look at the one place that has it and learn from our example."


Or...

"We're going to do everything we can to make sure that people focus on and see what we have here in New Hampshire, and that the right to openly carry a gun is good, and it's good for families, and it's good for New Hampshire," ... "It's important that people take a close look at a place that has it and learn from our example."


To paraphrase Orwell, some rights are more equal than others.


Gun Giveaway - This Weekend Only

Via GunsAmerica.com:

Guns Are An Individual Right Giveaway 2008



You must be an NRA member to enter.

And, if you'd be so kind to enter my referral code (31A37) on the form, I'd appreciate it. Thanks.


Thursday, May 15, 2008

Be Afraid...Be Very Afraid

It was scary back in January.

It's scary^2 today.

But privately, [John Edwards] he told aides that he would consider the role of vice president, and favored the position of attorney general, which would appeal to his experience of decades spent in courtrooms as a trial lawyer in North Carolina...


I don't think so, asshole.

I mean, we are talking about the guy who thinks taxpayer-funded entitlements and handouts are inalienable rights, and that the ability to purchase a handgun is a privilege to be doled out by politicians, such as himself, to the "chosen ones".


Also, how fast do you think President Obama would sign this crap into law?

(30) The term `semiautomatic assault weapon' means any of the following:

[snip]

(L) A semiautomatic rifle or shotgun originally designed for military or law enforcement use, or a firearm based on the design of such a firearm, that is not particularly suitable for sporting purposes, as determined by the Attorney General. In making the determination, there shall be a rebuttable presumption that a firearm procured for use by the United States military or any Federal law enforcement agency is not particularly suitable for sporting purposes, and a firearm shall not be determined to be particularly suitable for sporting purposes solely because the firearm is suitable for use in a sporting event.


Last up, you know I can't resist making fun of the truly idiotic. From the YouTube comments on the video linked above (and here):

MamaBear2008 (5 months ago)

The Bill of Rights is a list of STATES' rights, not necessarily individuals' rights. Read John's position on his website, you'll see he supports legal gun ownership. Just FYI, the US Supreme Court just agreed to hear a case on the right to bear arms--whether the right is for individuals or state militias. John is a big advocate of individuals' rights.


Not smarter than your average bear.


There, That's Better

Minor correction to the previously posted Obama flyer.


Mother's Day Open Carry Litter Pick-Up

POST UPDATED w/ PART 2 of 2 - BUMPED TO TOP

Dave Ridley has the after action report.



Part 2 to follow added.


The Only Ones "Professional Enough"...

As someone who lives on the edge of the "evacuation radius" around Seabrook Station, I can't say this has me brimming with confidence in the plant's security protocols.

Shooting accident third in 9 months by nuke plant guards

"Accidents"? Really?

SEABROOK — Three nuclear power plant security officers were the triggermen during separate accidental shootings during the past nine months, according to police.

The most recent incident involved an off-duty Seabrook Station security officer who accidentally shot a 9 mm bullet through his hand and will face criminal charges after making some medical progress, said Seabrook Police Chief Patrick Manthorn.


Let's see, he apparently pointed a loaded handgun at his hand and pulled the trigger. Unless there's some other way of shooting yourself in the hand that I'm not aware of, I'd say at least two counts of misdemeanor dumbass would be warranted.

The Seabrook chief did identify him as a resident of the Governor Weare Apartment complex, at 689 Lafayette Road, Seabrook, the same address where another off-duty nuclear plant officer misfired his gun in a different building during an unrelated incident. That shooting occurred Jan. 25 when power plant security trainer Joshua Hill pulled the trigger of his Springfield Armory handgun and shot a .45 caliber bullet through the floor of his apartment and into the living space below.

Manthorn said Hill, a security instructor at the nuke plant, was cleaning his gun at the time "and didn't realize it was loaded."

But, of course.

That's perfectly believable (just as long your definition of "cleaning one's gun" includes the phrase "playing Travis Bickle in front of the mirror").

A third recent and accidental shooting by a power plant officer was reported to Seabrook police in the fall, Manthorn confirmed Wednesday. That shooting occurred when the unnamed officer was holstering a .357 Sigarms pistol and "a round went off in the (nuclear plant) armory," said Manthorn. No charges were filed, said the Seabrook chief.

In 2002, another unnamed nuclear plant security guard was suspended without pay after he accidentally fired his gun inside a plant security post.


Something in the water maybe? Has the cooling tower been checked for leaks recently?

Seabrook power plant officers are not employed by the plant, but by the Wackenhut Corporation, a $3 billion global security provider with headquarters in Palm Beach Gardens, Fla. In response to the Herald's request for comment, Wackenhut spokesman Marc Shapiro said he was unavailable for an interview, but assured "all Wackenhut employees undergo a rigid employment screening process before hire.


Rigid.

Like string.

Then, they are thoroughly trained in accordance with (Nuclear Regulatory Commission) requirements."


They're trained in accordance with standards approved by the federal government. What could possibly go wrong?


Let's Play "Fill in the Blank"

From the ever-so "progressive" hamlet of Chicago:

The ordinance as it stands requires ____________________ to apply for a license at a cost between $500 and $2,000 every two years, submit to fingerprinting and a criminal background check, secure as much as $300,000 in liability insurance and be at least 21 years old.


Here are your choices:

(A) people who work with radioactive materials
(B) people who manufacture and/or sell fireworks or other explosives
(C) people who want to own a legally-registered machine gun
(D) people who want to put on a music concert

(link via Snowflakes in Hell)


Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Yeah, This Is Just What We Need

Jimmy Carter v2.0


Faith, Hope, Change, and Buttlube

My nominee for "Most Appropriately Named Website Ever"...

(click to enlarge)

(pic via Hot Air)


Because It Bears Repeating...Again

Yours Truly - February 2008:

Behold, the biggest load of crap ever to be smeared over the eyes of a public all too willing to lap this shit up - this "promise" that a small tax of X percent is needed to fund program Z, a program which, without fail will be geared toward helping The ChildrenTM, feeding homeless kittens, saving the planet from a fiery death, or whatever the PC cause celebre du jour happens to be at the time.

After a year's time (well beyond the memory capacity of the average voter) that X percent tax will become X+Y percent, and when the voters are told that this tax increase will be needed to offset budget shortfalls brought on by Programs A, B, and C, no one will so much as bat an eye.

And, why should they? None of them will even remember what Program Z was in the first place.


AP - May 13, 2008:

WASHINGTON - House Democrats are proposing a tax surcharge on millionaires to pay for a big increase in education benefits for veterans of the war in Iraq, lawmakers said Tuesday.


I guess it all depends on one's definition of "millionaires".

The $1 million income level would apply to couples. Individuals would pay the surcharge on income exceeding $500,000.


And, of course, the obligatory quote from the ambassador for The People's Republic of That's Not The Point, Asshole.

"What we're talking [read: lying - ed.] about is a one-half percent income tax surcharge on incomes above $1 million," said Rep. Mike Ross, D-Ark., a leader of the Blue Dog group. "So someone who earns $2 million a year would pay $5,000. ... They're not going to miss it."


What part of "Up yours, you insatiable, money-grubbing, socialist pricks!" do these insatiable, money-grubbing, socialist pricks not understand?


Not In My House

No. F****ing. Way.


Tuesday, May 13, 2008

A Super-Sized Helping of Impossible

The headline pretty much says it all.

Soccer City robber shot with own gun smuggled from Mexico

A robbery suspect was shot with his own gun when he tried to rob a west Phoenix soccer store Monday night.


That impossible!

Armed robbery is illegal.

Alberto Perez, 22, told police he had come into the United States illegally to get money to take back to Mexico.


That's extra-impossible!

It's against the law to come into the country illegally.

He had smuggled his gun with him.


That's super-extra-impossible!

Everyone knows that it's the NRA and the law-abiding gun owners in this country who are responsible for the "iron pipeline" of guns flowing INTO Mexico FROM the United States, not the other way around.

Perez went into Soccer City near 35th Avenue and McDowell Road at about 5:30 p.m., showed his gun and demanded money from the owner.


That's super-duper-extra-impossible!

Everyone knows that these "undocumented workers" aren't coming here to commit violent crimes, but to do the jobs that Americans can't be bothered doing for $50 an hour.

The owner managed to grab the gun from the suspect and the two got into a fight.


That's super-duper-extra-ultra-impossible!

Everyone knows that criminals are the only people skilled enough to take guns away from anyone, especially law-abiding citizens. This nonsense about mere mortals disarming highly-trained criminals is ridiculous.

The gun went off, hitting Perez in the leg and stomach.

He collapsed at the scene and was taken to a Phoenix hospital where he is recovering.

The owner was not hurt.


That there's just super-duper-extra-ultra-crazy-impossible!

Everyone knows that unless you cooperate [read: surrender] and "give your assailant any and everything that he wants", you will be gunned down in a spray-fired fusillade of hot lead.

It's pretty clear the incident described in that article never actually took place.

What kind of gullible idiots do they take us for?

UPDATE (5/15): Another "impossible" story about a gun in the news.

Kevin Eber had thrown a partially full beer can, striking Von Pohle's car. Von Pohle asked Eber why and Eber became violent, telling Von Pohle he was going to kill him. During that exchange, Shelton attacked Von Pohle, striking him with closed fists and slamming his head into a parked car.

Von Pohle attempted to fend off the attack but realized Eber was closing in on him as well. Von Pohle drew his concealed 9mm revolver (for which he had a weapon permit) and pointed it at both subjects telling them if they came any closer he would shoot. The suspects stopped their advance. Von Pohle also had called 911 to notify police.


IMPOSSIBLE!

No shots fired?

No fatalities?

Everyone knows that guns are only capable of killing as many people as they can. That's what they were designed for. There's no way anyone, including the guy who drew his gun, could have survived what should have been a bloodbath of monumental proportion.

When will these newspapers and TV networks stop lying to us?


Fear Not, Massachusetts "Progressives"!

Thanks, in part, to your "compassionate" leaders in Brookline and Cambridge, the poor people of the Commonwealth will continue to be discriminated against, should they attempt to exercise their Constitutionally-protected rights as American citizens.

[The Massachusetts House of Representatives] 75-83, rejected an amendment that would reduce the firearms licensing fee from $100 to $40 and expand to six years the length of time for which the license is valid. Under current law, the license is valid for five or six years, depending on the birthday of the license holder. The state receives $75 of the current $100 fee while the local community gets $25. Under the new $40 fee, local communities would still receive the same $25 while the state’s share would be reduced to $15. Amendment supporters said that the fee was raised in 1998 in order to fund a new and more efficient [read: discriminatory - ed.] system of licensing. They argued that the system is now in place and it is time to reduce the fee. Amendment opponents said that the state cannot afford the revenue loss.


Thank God! For a minute there, I thought the state's poor and down-trodden might be able to enjoy the same rights and privileges as those higher up the socio-economic ladder than themselves.

UPDATE: Just wanted to add that the opponents of this amendment, who were talking about the "revenue loss" that would follow this fee decrease, are the same fiscal wizards who said the country "couldn't afford" the Bush tax cuts. Of course, federal tax revenues went up following those tax RATE cuts. But, let's not let reality enter the equation here.

By, their "logic", for example, raising the current 5% sales tax to a 75% sales tax would result in a commensurate 1500% increase in revenue, because no other factors would come into play in their half-baked mathematical model, such as the 5000% increase we'd see in the number of people driving out-of-state, or simply turning to the internet, for all their shopping needs.

If they were to decrease the licensing fee by 60%, I guarantee you significantly fewer people would be discouraged from obtaining a license, and the increased number of applications submitted would all but wipe out any such predicted loss of revenue. It hardly takes a genius to see this.

Then again, if they were smart, they'd have real jobs.


Monday, May 12, 2008

Quick Question

What's the cut-off point for the number of arrests a state legislator can rack up before he or she is forced to relinquish her seat in Concord?

State Rep. Nancy Warren arrested for violating bail conditions

ROCHESTER — State Rep. and former city School Board Chairwoman Nancy Warren is back in Strafford County Jail following her fifth arrest in the past year, four of these arrest in just over two months.

Warren, 48, of 101 Lowell St. was arrested Saturday on a Class A misdemeanor of stalking in violation of previous bail orders. She is alleged to have used her cell phone Friday to call the same victim in three of four of her previous arrests. She is being held on $5,000 cash bail.

Judge Daniel Cappiello cautioned Warren on April 28 when she was video arraigned in District Court that if she violated her bail she would be subject to immediate arrest.


From her my.barackobama.com page:

Issues: foreign policy / security; smart energy policy; good government / ethics; electoral reform; affordable health care; education


Uh-huh.

Favorite Quote: Live each day to the fullest...


Well, she's certainly doing that. And, she's not about to let some meddling judge and his silly, little bail conditions stand in the way.

...then you're able to look forward with anticipation, and back without regret! Favorite motto: It never hurts to ask!


Wouldn't have hurt to ask asked the judge to clarify just what he meant, exactly, by "immediate arrest".

Previous post: Unfit for Duty


When Congress Imitates South Park

It seems a minor adjustment to this earlier post is in order.



There, that's more like it.

Straight from the Underpants Gnome's mouth:

In 2007, the Big Five oil companies reported record profits, with Exxon Mobil making over $40 billion. A windfall tax would help discourage these industries from consistently increasing their prices.

I am pleased to introduce a bill that would tax oil and gas companies for their excessive profits while encouraging them to decrease the prices for their products.

I am appalled by the spiraling prices at the gas pump and in home heating fuel. I am working to change the sharp contrast between the industries’ growing profits and Americans’ increasing inability to pay for oil and gas.

H.R. 5800 would tax such industries for their windfall profits. The bill would set up a Reasonable Profits Board to determine when these companies’ profits are in excess, and then tax them on those windfall profits.

U.S. Rep. Paul E. Kanjorski, Pennsylvania Democrat Communist


A "Reasonable Profits Board"? That's right up there with government-approved carbon radius on the list of utterly ridiculous and downright scary shit. The difference being, of course, that the former is being proposed by a sitting U.S. Congressman, while the latter was the product of my over-active imagination.

That said, I want what Kanjorski is smoking.

I hope he brought enough to share with the whole class.


Satan's Snowballs

Good luck.

BOSTON - Anti-tax activists have begun a second petition drive aimed at putting a question on the November state ballot which, if approved, would abolish the state income tax in Massachusetts.


History: Ignore At Your Own Peril

Good article in the Washington Times about the Virginia Citizen's Defense League, a gun rights advocacy group, and their recent effort to raise the public's awareness of the state's gun laws and to demonstrate that much of the PSH brought up in debates over gun laws by the anti-gun lawmakers in Virginia is simply, well, PSH.

Gun-toting diners draw little notice

The patrons at Champps in Reston, an upscale restaurant and bar chain, were eating ribs and drinking beer on a recent Saturday when customer Bruce Jackson stood up and made an announcement: He was armed, and so were dozens of other patrons.

The armed customers stood up in unison, showing off holstered pistols. Mr. Jackson said a word or two about the rights of gun owners to carry firearms in Virginia, then thanked everyone for his or her attention and sat down.

And the diners returned to their burgers and Budweisers.

The Virginia Citizens Defense League (VCDL) organized the dinner at Champps to prove a point: that the presence of armed customers in Northern Virginia restaurants would elicit little more than shrugs.

The dinner — and several other restaurant visits throughout Northern Virginia last month — were a response to comments from the majority leader in the state Senate, Democrat Richard L. Saslaw, who said during a legislative debate that armed patrons would be unwelcome in Northern Virginia restaurants.


This is similar to the numerous open carry events that have been held here in New Hampshire over the last couple years, where the objective is to improve the public's perception of gun owners - a perception that is, all too often, forged by the mainstream media's negative portrayal of gun owners and the role that gun rights play in a free society.

Most of the people these armed citizens encountered pretty much just shrugged their shoulders and went back to their meals, unfazed in any way by the customers with guns sitting at the next booth over, which is how one should react in this place we call America.

But as John Edwards is keen to tell us, there are two Americas.

He's right. There's the America inhabited by free citizens who understand the importance of self-reliance and individual liberty, and the America inhabited by people like Nathan Dicken, whose alarm clocks have been sounding the wake-up call for some time now, but they just keep hitting the snooze button.

Brendan Fitzgerald of Reston and his friends noticed the guns immediately. They were curious but unconcerned.

"I'm just laughing because it's totally unnecessary in my opinion," Mr. Fitzgerald said, pointing to one individual who not only was armed but also had several clips of ammunition attached to his belt.

"This is Reston, not Southeast," said his friend, Nathan Dicken, contrasting the Northern Virginia suburb to a section of the District known for gun violence.


Now, let's hop into the Wayback Machine, take it back to April 15, 2007, and imagine these two talking to a Times reporter while sitting a classroom watching some of their fellow students coming to class and taking their seats with holstered handguns on their hips.

Brendan Fitzgerald of Reston and his friends noticed the guns immediately. They were curious but unconcerned.

"I'm just laughing because it's totally unnecessary in my opinion," Mr. Fitzgerald said, pointing to one individual who not only was armed but also had several clips of ammunition attached to his belt.

"This is Virginia Tech, not Ballou High School," said his friend, Nathan Dicken, contrasting the prestigious university to a high school in a section of the District known for gun violence.


Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

(link via Say Anything)


Sunday, May 11, 2008

Making the Country a Safer Place...

...one dead scumbag at a time.

Fort Worth Donut Shop Robber Shot & Killed

A Fort Worth businesswoman was almost robbed at her shop, but a neighbor comes to her rescue. In the end, the man suspected of the crime is shot and killed.

Chong Im Randle, who friends call Angel, described her conversation with the would-be robber. "I say you not to shoot. Okay, you kill me I'm going to heaven. You go to jail."

[...]

Randal says 45-year-old Richard Lane wore a mask when he broke into Happy Donuts around 1:30 a.m., with what looked like a rifle. He stole money from the cash drawer, beat Randal up and tried to steal her car.

[...]

Meanwhile her neighbor, 54-year-old Stanley Livingston, heard the commotion next door, grabbed his shotgun and ran over to help. That's when Lane allegedly pointed his gun at Livingston, who fired one shot killing the robber.


What a bitter, gun-clinging, immigrant-hating American! He should have chosen the more enlightened and progressive response of calling 911 and listening to the sounds of the immigrant shopkeeper being brutally assaulted over the course of the next three or four minutes, while waiting for the police to show up.

It's what Barack wants us all to do, if we find ourselves in a similar situation as this.

And, he knows best.

His wife said so.

And, here's one from the "Who Could've Guessed?" files:

According to Fort Worth police Lane was armed with a BB gun rifle during the robbery. State records indicate Lane had an extensive criminal history, including aggravated assault and aggravated robbery.


I sit here truly shocked.

Gun Control: Because the right of a violent, career criminal to break into a woman's place of business in the middle of the night, beat the crap out of her blind is more sacred than the right of her law-abiding neighbor to prevent him from doing so.


Saturday, May 10, 2008

Scenes From Bitter America

Magnusson Farm, Rte. 125, Kingston, New Hampshire


Screened loam, crushed stone, gravel fill at 10 cents per shovel on the honor system. Take as much as you need and put the money in the box.


Dispatch From Planet Cuckoo-Clock

When a person's reality disconnect control knob goes up to 11.

"...the major networks are run by right-winged conservatives..."


As my daughter is fond of saying...whatev.


Friday, May 09, 2008

Assault Weapons On the Jobsite

File Under: Gimme a frickin' break.

Investigative Report: Nail gun safety under fire as injuries soar

With a 2 1/2-inch nail deep in his chest, construction worker Manuel Murillo slid into a pickup truck, bracing himself for a desperate seven-mile drive down a snowy Sierra road.

His friend and co-worker, Salvador Cardenas, was driving. When they finally got cell phone reception, Murillo, 30, called his wife in nearby Portola to tell her there had been an accident. He had shot himself with a nail gun while working on a mountain cabin. And he was going to die.

"I love you," he said, before hanging up.

Murillo had been struck down by a popular tool of his trade – the air-powered nail gun – equipped with a mechanism that allowed automatic firing.


Oh no! Efficient tools! Eeeeek!!!

As the tool's popularity surged during the building boom of the 2000s, a Sacramento Bee investigation found, nail gun injuries also took off despite decades of warnings from researchers and doctors that the guns are dangerous, especially in the automatic mode known as "contact trip."


You mean, more nail guns in use didn't result in fewer nail gun injuries? Wow. What are the odds of that?

Driven by compressed air, the brawniest nail guns can blast 30 nails a minute that travel up to 490 feet per second, qualifying the nails as low-velocity missiles.


As opposed to what? Super-low-velocity missiles?

In contact trip mode, with one pull of the trigger, they fire those missiles whenever the muzzle makes contact with a surface – including heads, hands, eyes and even chests.


Sorry, but if you're pressing a nail gun into your eye hard enough to allow the trigger to engage, you're pretty much scraping gray matter already.

California companies reported 1,890 nail gun injuries leading to missed work days from 2003 to 2006, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. That tally includes a small portion of those injured in part because undercounting is widespread, according to a 2006 report by the state Legislative Analyst's Office.

A more comprehensive national estimate found that 42,000 people with nail gun injuries – more than 100 a day – show up at U.S. hospital emergency departments annually. Others are treated at clinics or at home.

Treating the wounds costs the United States at least $338 million a year in emergency medical care, rehabilitation and workers' compensation, according to a Consumer Product Safety Commission estimate. That's 10 times the cost of treating jigsaw, power sander or band saw injuries, and double that for handsaws.


Actual hours of usage of jigsaws, power sanders, and band saws in use conveniently left out of the discussion, I see. I'd be more than comfortable saying that nail guns are used more than ten times as much as band saws in the construction industry when you add up all the hours of use for either tool.

But, why let facts and figures interfere with a good fear-mongering session? Especially when you're on such a good PSH-saturated roll as this one.

Working on scaffolding 7 feet off the ground, Murillo and Cardenas shared the Hitachi gun. At one point, Cardenas recalled during a tearful interview, he heard the tool fire and Murillo yell. When he turned to look, Murillo was grabbing his chest.

Murillo had bought the gun just a few weeks before at a local hardware store, according to a Plumas County Sheriff's Department report.


Time to close the "hardware store loophole"!

It had two firing modes, a contact trip and a semiautomatic single shot, with a toggle switch between the two.


AAAGHHH!!! SEMIAUTOMATIC MISSILE LAUNCHERS!!! I think I may have pooped a tiny bit in my pants. Hold me!

Murillo's gun was switched to contact trip, according to the state investigation into his death.

The gun was hanging from the end of the scaffolding, at chest level. Cardenas thinks that as Murillo turned sideways to pass the gun, he accidentally bumped into it.


And accidentally pulled the trigger at the same time?

Or do you suppose it's more likely that this guy had a piece of wire wrapped around the handle tying the trigger back?

"Dude, look. It's like wicked fast now!"

I'd love the be the judge on this case. I'd set up a 4x6 piece of lumber on a couple saw horses in the courtroom and ask the guy's lawyer to demonstrate with a similar Hitachi nailer how the thing just "went off" by only being bumped on the business end of it.

After the guy tries and fails, I'd take a piece of wire and tie the trigger back and run a whole stick of nails into the wood in about 20 seconds by swinging the nailgun from the airhose.

In fact, I might just take my framing and finish nailers out tomorrow and do it myself. It's been a while since I had any good video to post. I bet I can trash this guy's entire case in less than five minutes. Two words: USER ERROR.

Following repeated calls for safer firing mechanisms and millions of dollars in legal payouts to injury victims, the nail gun industry in 2003 started to make semiautomatic guns that require users to pull the trigger each time they fire.


Unlike semiautomatic "assault weapons", which we all know are "spray-firing bullet hose".

Seriously, though, this "blame the tool" shit is getting ridiculous.

Fairfield carpenter Jack Sperduto fired a nail into his hand at Travis Air Force Base in 1998. The wound left behind nerve damage and pain so excruciating that years of treatments, surgeries and drugs didn't relieve it, leaving his hand useless and his head filled with suicidal thoughts, medical reports show.

Sperduto sued Senco, the manufacturer, and won $960,000.


But, of course. Who could have foreseen bad things happening as a result of placing one's hand in the line of fire of a pneumatic nailer?

Edward Ramos was a carpenter with Ralph Rocca Construction Inc. in Apple Valley in June 2005 when his boss directed him to use his nail gun to attach metal hurricane straps to wood trusses, a state investigation report says.

Ramos told crew leader Randy Cannon that the smaller palm hammer was better for the job because big nail guns are awkward in tight angles. Cannon said the palm hammer was "in the shop," Cal-OSHA documents state.

Ramos repeatedly said he didn't want to use the nail gun. He had no safety glasses or other eye protection. Cannon responded that he had "faith that (Ramos) could get it done using the nail gun."

A short time later, Ramos felt something slam into his face. His right eye started bleeding.

A co-worker drove Ramos to Victor Valley Hospital. From there, he was airlifted to Loma Linda University Hospital, a nail lodged in his brain.


You wanna blame a tool for this? Start with tool who told his worker to proceed with his work in an unsafe fashion. I own several pneumatic nailers and staplers, and have driven 1000's of fasteners with them over the years. Yet, somehow, I have managed to refrain from shooting myself in the head, hand, chest, groinular region, etc.

How can that be? I must have achieved some kind of Jedi-like mastery over these violent and deadly objects (which are only slightly more complicated than a desk stapler to operate safely).

Anyway, it's late and I'm tired. But, I do have one more vitally important point to make before I hit the sack.

Randy Cannon is one serioulsy awesome pornstar name.

(link via Say Uncle)


I Guess It All Depends...

...on one's definition of posed.

Melissa Rowley left her children playing in the front yard for only a moment to step into her house.

When she came back a coyote was dragging her daughter away.

It was the third time in five days a coyote had posed a threat to a small child in Southern California, San Bernardino Sheriff's spokeswoman Arden Wiltshire said.


Gun Control: Because the right of a coyote to drag your child away
is more sacrosanct than your right to prevent it from doing so.


(link via reader Jeff)


Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before

NBC10.com:

No criminal charges will be filed against two police officers who accidental shot a South Jersey toddler after a gun went off in his home.

The shooting happened when his father, a Deptford Township police officer, and another officer were cleaning their firearms.


...over a cold bucket of Miller Lites.



Just like if this was Joe Citizen drinking beer in his backyard (in New Jersey, remember) with his buddies, who had pointed a loaded handgun at a small child and pulled the trigger, the police would simply give him a strong talking to, tell him to have a nice day and to be more careful next time, and drive away.

Uh huh.

Lastly, how tough is this to remember?

How to Clean a Firearm

Step 1: UNLOAD THE DAMN GUN!

And, yes, I see what appear to be gun cleaning kits in the picture, so it's possible they were, in fact, cleaning their guns at the time this shooting took place. That doesn't change the fact that the officers in question were grossly negligent and should face charges for what they did, just as you or I certainly would if we were in their shoes.


I Blame the NRA

Drug deaths soar in Boston

Deaths from drugs and alcohol in Boston soared dramatically in 2006, an increase fueled by cheap heroin, the allure of crystal methamphetamine, and the widespread availability of addictive prescription medications.


Ban heroin!

Oh, wait...


Just So We're Clear

Accident:

FRANCONIA – A hiker climbing up Mount Lafayette yesterday afternoon was killed in a freak accident, when a huge boulder crashed from its perch and struck her.

Shu Qin, 28, of Shanghai, China, was staying with friends in Wellesley, Mass., and they were hiking up the Falling Waters trail in Franconia Notch, according to Fish and Game Lt. Todd Bogardus.

Qin and her brother-in-law were more than a mile up the trail at Cloudland Falls "when a large boulder broke off a ledge" and tumbled about 40 feet before striking her, leaving her with severe head injuries.


Not an accident:

A Manchester woman about to reach her goal of going to beauty school died in a single-car accident Wednesday night on Interstate 93 in Canterbury.

Meghan Casella, 20, was thrown from her 2002 Nissan Maxima at 11:20 p.m. when it crashed on I-93. She died at the scene, New Hampshire State Police said.

[...]

Police said she was driving at a high rate of speed when she lost control of her car, which veered off the road, came back up onto the interstate and then rolled over several times.

Speed and alcohol appear to be contributing factors in the crash, police said.