Monday, February 28, 2005

Bicycle Control Now!

Well, it was that or Fetchez la Schwinn!

17-Year-Old To Face Charges

POSTED: 12:33 pm EST February 28, 2005

BOSTON -- A 17-year-old Acton, Mass., man was arrested after he allegedly threw a 10-speed bicycle off the roof of a three-story apartment building, hitting and seriously injuring a woman on the sidewalk below.

At least it wasn't one of those 21-speed "assault" bicycles.

Justin E. Towne was charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon following the incident early Saturday morning. Towne was expected to be arraigned Monday.

David Procopio, a spokesman for Suffolk District Attorney Dan Conley, said the woman's boyfriend told police that the couple was walking in front of an apartment building on Allston Street at about 1:25 a.m. Saturday when a beer can came down from the roof, hitting his girlfriend. The man said a bicycle then fell from the roof, striking his 24-year-old girlfriend in the head and knocking her to the sidewalk.

Seriously, what the freakin' hell is wrong with some people today? I have consumed a LOT of beer over the last 20+ years, and done some pretty stupid stuff, but not once did I ever say to myself, "Hey, you know what I feel like doing? Hucking a bike off the roof at someone. Man, how cool would that be?"

And what's with the A&B charge? Screw that. I'd hit the little bastard with attempted murder and let his lawyer plea-bargain down to felony assault and battery. No trial required. Five years. Too bad. So sad. Bye bye. End of story.

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue


Real porn - same price.

Victoria's Secret catalog - FREE.

Now, don't say I never did you any favors.

The Oscars in Five Words or Less

Chris Rock: Blah blah Bush lied blah.

Beyonce: Horrible french, mais quelle rack!

Overall: Hey, Independence Day's on Fox!

Friday, February 25, 2005

Taking the Cake

Sometimes in life, your first instincts can be second-best. Proof of this comes from James Taranto's Best of the Web column today.

When the pictures of Condi Rice in her high-heeled boots hit the papers, the first thing I thought of was Nancy Sinatra's "These Boots Are Made For Walking" and perusing the blogosphere's coverage of this, it seems I was not alone in that regard.

But, I'm kicking myself for missing this one:

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows what's best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes
I want a girl with the right allocation
Who's fast, and thorough, and sharp as a tack
She's playing with her jewelry, she's putting up her hair
She's touring the facility and picking up slack
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong jacket.

"Short Skirt/Long Jacket" by Cake (2001)

By the way, if you haven't heard Cake's cover of Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive", you're missing a gem. Check 'it out.

For Hillary

These boots are made for walking,
And that's just what they'll do.
One of these days these boots
Are gonna walk all over you.


Have you seen the new Batmobile?

Patty has another pic up here.

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Welcome, Brookline TAB Readers

Loyal reader and Brookline resident, Seth, had this letter to the editor published today by the Brookline TAB.

Letter: Does safety correlate with gun laws?

As a lifelong Brookline resident, I have been following with great interest the three-week series in the TAB about the problems of obtaining a license to carry concealed weapons in Brookline. You might be interested to know this matter is now all over the blogosphere, with the local blog leading the charge.

I'll just say this on the matter. Here in Massachusetts, we have some of the most restrictive gun laws in the nation, and quite a bit of crime. Right above us in New Hampshire, they have some of the most lenient gun laws in the nation, and right next to that in Vermont, there are the single most lenient gun laws in the nation. Why is it I feel much safer in New Hampshire and safest of all in Vermont?

Why indeed?

Not Your (Founding) Father's Oldsmobile

Just a couple items from a recent TIME magazine interview with Massachusetts Senator Ted "I Wouldn't Know Hypocrisy if it Caught Fire, Crawled Up My Ass, and Died" Kennedy:

On Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist's idea to change the chambers' rules to stop Democrats from filibustering judges, the so-called "nuclear option":

"The Founding Fathers addressed this issue at the Constitutional Convention and what they did was to indicate they wanted a shared power between the Senate and the executive. Some people believe the Senate should be a rubber stamp. That's not what the Founding Fathers wanted."

Ted "I've Never Met a Gun Control Law I Didn't Like" Kennedy recognizing and honoring the intentions of our Founding Fathers? What a friggin' joke.

On the Democratic Party's trying to reclaim "values":

"I'm very, very hopeful and very bullish. I think we can win that battle. We value hard work and we value honesty. We think poverty in terms of the increased problems we're facing here is a moral issue. We'll win the battle on moral values."

Of course Senator Kennedy and the rest of the nation's marxists socialists leftists "progressives" value hard work. Where else is the money for all their social welfare programs going to come from? Someone has to come up with the cash to subsidize health care costs and college tuition for illegal aliens and their children.

Sword Control Now!

From the Boston Herald:

Sword play lands boy in hospital

A 13-year-old boy almost bled to death when he accidentally stabbed himself in the leg with a "razor sharp" three-foot sword, but was recovering yesterday in a Salem hospital room.

Nevin Pothier, 13, was practicing martial arts at his Nahant home Sunday afternoon when the sword "evidently slipped out of his hands," and sliced his femoral artery, police said.


Hutton said Nevin had surgery and is expected to recover. No criminal charges will be filed.

Can we expect waves of outrage from the gun "safety" (read: gun banning) organizations? They're constantly wailing about the need to protect our children from grievous harm. Well, it doesn't get more grievous than slicing your arteries open with a sword. The hypocrisy is sickening.

Fortunately, Nevin is expected to recover, but it could have been MUCH worse. Imagine how the parents would have felt had their son died from his injury. It takes just a second for questionable judgment to turn into unimaginable tragedy.

Do you think these parents, or any parents, would allow their 13-year-old son to practice defensive handgun use in the house with a loaded firearm? No, of course they wouldn't. Now ask yourself which is potentially more dangerous, a gun that requires knowledge of how to operate it in order to discharge a round or a "razor sharp" sword that can cause serious injury by merely touching it?

Or, which of the tools below would cause you greater concern in the hands of a two-year-old child?

Which presents a greater danger inthe hands of a small child?

Now, which of those requires no license to purchase? Which is not subject to any state "safe storage" laws? Which is easily accessible on kitchen countertops throughout the country?

To summarize, in Massachusetts, if you allow your child access to a razor sharp object (designed, by the way, for the purpose of killing people), and he slices his femoral artery open as a result thereof, you will not be prosecuted. But let your kid so much as look at a gun in your house and suddenly you're a danger to society, and you will be facing a judge in the near future as a consequence of your reckless behavior.

In the Bay State, this is known as "common sense".

I think I'd best keep my mouth shut now before some nutjob legislator takes my "advice" and actually introduces legislation banning private ownership of sharp objects. As I wrote in the comments to this post at The Kallini Brothers:

I would propose legislation that would require all food goods to be sold in pieces no larger than a 1/2-inch cube.

Likewise, all string and rope shall me sold in precut lengths ranging from 6 inches to 150 feet, in 6-inch increments.

This will make possible a nationwide ban on knives.

Metal scissors will also be banned. Any citizen who wishes to have something cut that can’t be cut with plastic scissors must take that item to a government-licensed cutting facility where specially trained federal employees will cut the material to the proper size and shape.

Also, to curb the epidemic of baseball bat injuries, baseball and softball, up through the collegiate level will now be played without bats. When the pitch crosses the plate, the umpire will determine if the batter would have swung at it had he or she been holding a bat.

If a swing would have taken place, the batter will push a button on a hand-held remote control device and a randomly-generated outcome will appear on the scoreboard. The batter would than take appropriate action (e.g. go to second base for a double, or return to the bench for a popout).

Naturally, future amendments would be introduced, addressing licensing and testing requirements for swimming pools, bug spray, matches, hammers, screwdrivers, shovels, rocks, etc.

It's "for the children". You understand.

Welcome, Blute and Scotto Listeners

Here's the post Scotto was referring to on the show this morning. I figure I'd save you the trouble of poking through a year's worth of archived posts looking for it.

And remember to check back often for more commentary on life in the Bay State as seen through the eyes of a "recovering Democrat turned Independent-conservative-libertarian stuck (for the time being) in Kennedy Country". If you like what you see here, you're gonna LOVE my upcoming series of Big Dig "Inside Dirt" posts.

Stay tuned.

And, thanks for the plug, Scotto. When are we going shooting?

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

The Big Pig Swig Frig Dig

They're getting warmer.

Inspectors lax on Dig wall woes

During years of Big Dig tunnel construction, the project's largest contractor repeatedly violated work requirements with the full knowledge of inspectors who in many instances failed to correct faulty work, a Herald investigation has found.


Although inspectors for project manager Bechtel/Parsons Brinckerhoff talked tough in memos and inspection reports, they did not always force contractors to immediately correct mistakes, construction documents show.

For example, inspectors repeatedly noted that slurry violated contract specifications during the excavation of wall sections that would eventually develop defects. On other defective panels, inspectors discovered damaged concrete or obstructions that would eventually cause significant leaks.

I must say I enjoy reading these updates on the investigations into the construction deficiencies that have plagued the Big Dig over the last decade or so. And who knows? Someday, they might even figure it all out, not that I'm holding my breath waiting for that to happen. It's unlikely they'll be calling me for my input.

But, hey, what do I know? I only worked for Bechtel on the Big Dig from 1991 to 2000 in varying capacities, including Materials Laboratory Technician, Materials Engineer, and Field Engineer/Inspector. Reinforced concrete, slurry wall construction, paving operations, underground utility trenches, drilled caissons, soil analysis, tunnel jacking, steel erection - you name it, I've probably seen it.

So stay tuned. I plan on writing a series of posts (as soon as I can find the time), detailing my personal experience with and first-hand knowledge of the sheer incompetence that permeated virtually every department on that project, from before the first shovel hit the dirt up until the point I decided enough was enough and moved on to (much) greener pastures.

Buckle up, kids, and keep your hands inside the car at all times. It's gonna be a fun ride.

Better Pissed Off Than Pissed On

File this one under "Why Can't We Be More Like Europe?"

WHEN JOHAN VANDE LANOTTE, Belgium's Vice Prime Minister, goes to the toilets today, he finds the urinals in the offices of his ministry decorated with stickers. They show an American flag and the head of George W. Bush. "Go ahead. Piss on me," the caption says. Vande Lanotte is one of Bush's hosts in Brussels. Is peeing on your guest's head appropriate? In Belgium it is. After all, Brussels' best known statue is that of "Manneken Pis," a peeing boy.

The piss stickers, specially made to be used in urinals, can be seen these days in the public toilets of Belgian schools, youth clubs, and pubs. They were designed by Laurent Winnock, president of the Young Socialists, the youth branch of Vande Lanotte's Socialist party. [color me stunned - ed.] Winnock did his creative work during his office hours, which would not be worth mentioning if Winnock did not work in the offices of Vice Prime Minister Vande Lanotte, as one of his press spokesmen.

And what post would be complete without the appropriate Monty Python tie-in?

Braddon (Michael Palin): Well now, the result of last week's competition when we asked you to find a derogatory term for the Belgians. Well, the response was enormous and we took quite a long time sorting out the winners. There were some very clever entries. Mrs Hatred of Leicester Said 'let's not call them anything, let's iust ignore them'.

(applause starts vigorously, but he holds his hands up for silence)

And a Mr. St. John of Huntingdon said he couldn't think of anything more derogatory than Belgians.

And now, back to our regularly scheduled news item:

Meanwhile, however, a citizen of Ghent, where the stickers had also been distributed, has filed a complaint with the Belgian judiciary headed by Onkelinx. "This sticker has nothing to do with freedom of speech," he says. "If I go to the gents in the pub nowadays, I am forced to pee on Bush and the American flag because it is impossible to miss this sticker."

Nothing's impossible, my Belgian friend. Just pretend you're at the popular Boston College watering hole (emphasis on HOLE), Mary Anne's in Cleveland Circle and pee in the sink like everyone else.

(link via Stark Truth)

Talk About a Stiff Fine

As much as I tend to sit on the pro-personal liberty side of the fence, and find myself in agreement with the ACLU in this case, I can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, the Supreme Court has more pressing issues to deal with these days.

How the case surrounding this asinine piece of legislation even made it as far as it did through our legal system astounds me. Though, once again, I take solace in the knowledge that Massachusetts isn't the only totally screwed up state in the country.

Supreme Court Rejects Appeal on Ban on Sex Toy Sale

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The U.S. Supreme Court (news - web sites) rejected on Tuesday a constitutional challenge to an Alabama law that makes it a crime to sell sex toys.


The law prohibited the distribution of "any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs." First-time violators can face a fine of up to $10,000 and as much as one year in jail.

The law, adopted in 1998, allowed the sale of ordinary vibrators and body massagers that are not designed or marketed primarily as sexual aids. It exempted sales of sexual devices "for a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial or law enforcement purpose."

There is so much wrong with that last paragraph, where to start?

Can someone please explain to me what the "educational purpose" of a 24" King Kong Double Dong might be? And will they now be required to be marked similarly to high normal-capacity pistol magazines, with "For Law Enforcement Use Only" stamped on the side? I mean, I can understand how one would want to avoid the scarring and other physical evidence left behind by, say, a plunger handle, but still.

And, oh yeah, huh huh huh...they said "bona fide".

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

That's 14 Cases of RWB in 1985

I SO wouldn't have qualified for this.

ANN ARBOR, Mich. - Some University of Michigan students are cleaning up their acts in more ways than one.

They are getting $100 cash payments for keeping their dorm rooms presentable and opening their doors so prospective students and their parents can take a look during campus visits.


Participants must let tour groups see their room in the middle of the day, and have to be out of bed and dressed, said Randi Johnson, the university's housing outreach coordinator. Display of anything illegal, offensive or banned is forbidden.

I suspect my roommate's cat hide that served as our welcome mat might have run afoul of these guidelines.

Land-Ho Down Under

This statement might have carried a bit more weight had it not come from someone who's bounced off rock star dick like a friggin' pinball.

CHER doesn't have any respect for her younger pop rivals. The 56-year-old diva didn't mince words when explaining her quasi-imminent retirement on her never-ending farewell tour. "I'm not going to give up show business because, you know, there are all of these young girls coming out like Britney and J. Lo,'' the icon told the Auckland, Australia crowd. After loud boos rose up from the crowd of 20,000, Cher added: "I know. They are hoes, aren't they?"

I really don't see any need to carry this train of thought any further down the rails. So PLEASE, for the love of God, in the name of all that is good in this world, do not click here.


This article was in Thursday's Brookline TAB. With the long weekend approaching, I clearly wasn't my usual observant self, else this would have been promptly posted.

It seems the good doctor is looking to take his case to the federal court in Boston on the grounds of civil rights violations. Needless to say, I will be watching this quite closely. It may take me a few days to respond or to even notice the news as it is reported, but I will be watching - and posting accordingly.

What I find most reassuring here is the number of similarly-affected Brookline residents reportedly coming forward to assist Dr. Lu and his attorney in this matter. Here's hoping they fight this fight on all fronts, in every legal venue available to them, and that they drag these filthy bastards over the coals and back again.

Army doc eyes federal lawsuit

By Rick Holland/Staff Writer
Thursday, February 17, 2005

A budding Army doctor is lining his legal arsenal with additional ammunition in a lawsuit against the Brookline Police Department.

Having claimed that his hunting and target practice gun license was improperly revoked by the Brookline Police in June 2003, U.S. Army 2nd Lieut. Kang Lu was set to appear in Brookline District Court on Feb. 1 to get a judge's ruling on the matter.

That hearing, which was to have featured questioning of Brookline Police Chief Daniel O'Leary, was canceled when the judge called in sick.

After the TAB first reported about Lu's inability to secure a gun permit, his lawyer Jesse Cohen says he has been besieged by calls from other residents who also have complaints about discourteous treatment and trumped-up reasons for denial of licenses by Brookline police.


Part of Lu's complaint is that he was called by Raskin to arrange a visit "to discuss" his license application at Lu's apartment in June 2003. But Raskin used the visit to hand Lu a license denial letter, at which point Raskin - accompanied by several additional officers - confiscated Lu's firearms.

Over the coals.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Have a Good Weekend

OK, one more "Compare and Contrast" before I take an early weekend from blogging.

Compare this story I linked to earlier with this story out of Louisiana.

Both events took place in the victim's home at night:

The accuser...told investigators that she was getting ready for bed...

Georgia Belle Sullivan says she was sleeping before dawn yesterday...

Both the intruders were masked:

...A man dressed in black and wearing a ski mask...

...and had taped a sweat shirt to his head as a makeshift mask.

Both women were physically assaulted:

...grabbed her from behind, held a knife to her throat...

...that's when a man lunged at her.

But, here's where the plotlines diverge significantly.

...he tied her to her bed, gagged her and raped her...

...the man died from the gunshot wound.

Enough said.

Yet, if you listen to the liberal politicians here in Massachusetts and elsewhere, they will honestly have you believe that a women becoming a rape/murder victim with her panties at her ankles is somehow a more preferable outcome than a woman with a dead would-be rapist/murderer at her feet.

Oh yeah, sorry, they're not "liberal". They're "progressive". I keep forgetting.

OK, I'm out of here. See you Monday. Not you, Jay, I'll see you Sunday. I hope you stocked up on .30-Carbine. I'll spring for the rest. Looking forward to shooting the new SW99.

Whistling Dixie

From the Boston Herald:

Woman's reservoir assault prompts warning

Authorities are warning women to use caution when walking along the Chestnut Hill Reservoir after a Boston College student was viciously assaulted.

The 18-year-old BC student told police Wednesday that two men "grabbed her, pinned her down on the ground, banged her head on the wrought-iron railing and committed indecent assault and battery," said state police Sgt. John Gentile, who is leading the investigation into the Feb. 4 incident.

Had the girl not kicked one man in the face and escaped, she probably would have been raped, Gentile said.

OK, I'm confused now. Which is it? Submit to your attacker and pray he doesn't hurt/rape/kill you? Or fight back and defend yourself? Both of these suggestions are being given as advice to women who find themselves the victim of assault.

Apparently, it's "give them what they want (as long as they don't want to harm you in anyway) AND fight back (if they do)". To help clarify things, police will now be distributing flyers containing questionnaires for women to hand out to their attackers. Once the assailants have honestly and thoroughly answered all twelve questions concerning the scope of their intended criminal activity, and afforded the woman sufficient time to analyze the data, the victim will then have the information necessary to mount her counter-attack (or lack thereof).

And once again, we are subjected to the Boston Police Department's timely community notification policy. There is simply no excuse for delaying notification of the public for TWO WEEKS after the attack took place. How many women could these vermin assault in two weeks? How far out of town could they get in that same timespan?

Gentile advised women not to walk alone at night around the area of the reservoir, which is owned by the state Department of Conservation and Recreation, and suggested they carry whistles.

Whistles, questionnaires - same thing.

Compare and Contrast - Denver Edition

Publicola knocks one out of the park (and over the Pike, for the Fenway Faithful) with this rather lengthy piece on the efforts of the people and elected officials of Denver to combat violent crime, specifically a series of armed sexual assaults, in their neighborhoods. This one's heavy on the "compare" and light on "contrast".

The Security Of Denial; The "Empowerment" Of Ignorance

Here's but one piece of many worth highlighting:

"Victim urges neighborhood to fight back, rally Saturday"

Finally, some sanity.

"The victim of Friday's sexual assault at a Denver pet store is urging the neighborhood to come forward to fight the attacker and participate in an anti-violence rally on Saturday."

Or not.

"The store will be here and ... we will continue living and ... I need to continue living,' the victim said. 'I realized this was an issue so much bigger than myself. They need to know this violence is not going to be tolerated and that this neighborhood is going to be safe again.' The woman and her friends plan to have a rally at the pet store on Saturday to show support for her and other victims."

Violence was tolerated. Violence will be tolerated. Unless someone is willing to use violence to stop it then violence will continue in that neighborhood. Wishing does not make it so.

You could just as easily substitute Boston, Cambridge, or Brookline (or any such "progressive-minded" city in America) for Denver throughout his post, and no one would notice the difference.

Another Democrat Meets Reality

Kevin at Smallest Minority - who should be on your "daily reads" list, if he isn't already - links to this column written by a disheartened Democrat who seems to have a firm grasp on the reality behind the downfall of John Kerry and his party, and isn't afraid to admit it.

Speaking as someone who recently threw away a Carhartt jacket, because it actually wore out after 10+ years, I found this bit particularly poignant:

And as the Democratic Party hierarchy grew increasingly bicoastal intellectual elite, more and more of the low- and middle-class Joes joined the exodus, not out of bigotry but because they weren't stupid: They may not have had graduate degrees, but they knew when they were being condescended to.

When John Kerry went bird hunting in a Carhartt jacket that still had the folds from the box in it and held his shotgun like a yachtsman's telescope, he synthesized and symbolized the state of the Democratic Party today:

The elitist, stooping to offer a limp handshake to the Great Unwashed.

Yet there are those on the left who still wonder why such a "positive" image failed to win over the hearts and minds of the American Midwest. How often have you heard the Democrats explain their candidate's defeat as a result of their failure to get their message to the people? This couldn't be further from reality. Not only did the message reach the masses, but as soon as it hit the ground it spread like wildfire through a wheat field.

Wile E. Coyote vs. 2-by-4

From the Boston Herald:

Rabid coyote attacks Cape mom

A Cape Cod man ran to his wife's rescue yesterday using a piece of lumber to cripple an attacking coyote that had locked its rabies-infected jaws on her wrist, police said.

The coyote was shot twice and killed by police, Sgt. Ben Baxter said.

Marstons Mills resident Cindy Parker-Kelley let the couple's Norwegian elkhound out yesterday around 7 a.m. A short time later, she heard the dog yelping in the back yard, police said.

When she looked outside, Baxter said she saw the family pet had cornered the rabid coyote.

When she ran out and tried to shoo away the critter, the coyote attacked her, police said.

David Kelley ran outside in his underwear, saw the animal latched onto his wife's arm, and grabbed a piece of lumber. He whacked the lunging animal several times, police said.

"I couldn't believe how brazen it was to keep coming at me," Kelley told WCVB-TV (Ch. 5).

Now would be the time to ask the seemingly obvious question, what was she thinking, approaching a wild animal and flailing her arms around like that. It turns out - and no, as much as I wish otherwise, I'm not making this up - she was following the appropriate course of action as laid out by MassWildlife (see this previous post).

"We need to tell people to harass the animals," said Marion Larson, information and education biologist for MassWildlife. "We don't want people to be afraid. This is one animal that instead of standing there and watching it take a nap, go give it a lesson."

Well, she gave it a lesson alright - and a snack.

Welcome to Massachusetts. Had this story unfolded outside the confines of the People's Republic, there would have been just one phone call made that morning - to Animal Control for carcass removal, preceded of course, by a discussion between the homeowners over which firearm to use to relieve the coyote of it's cerebral functions.

Your homework: Read the post linked above, then take this brief quiz to see how well you'd fare against a coyote in your back yard. Take your time and answer thoughtfully, you will be graded on this.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

What a Sad Bunch of Pansies

Has Red Sox Nation suddenly turned into a bunch of sniveling girly-men? First Mike Greenwell, now this.

FORT MYERS - Leery of appearing that they are taking their success and rubbing it in the collective face of the New York Yankees, the Red Sox are leaning against presenting World Series rings to players prior to the home opener at Fenway Park on April 11.

Ever since the Sox won their first title in 86 years and it was learned that the first home series of the year would be against the Yankees, New Englanders have relished the idea of the ages-old rivals having to watch the rings being presented at Fenway. The ceremony, which will undoubtedly be accompanied by great fanfare and celebration, may not be proper to conduct in front of the team the Sox defeated in the ALCS before heading on to sweep the St. Louis Cardinals, according to executive vice president Dr. Charles Steinberg.

"There's a degree of decorum you'd like to show and a degree of respect you'd like to demonstrate," Steinberg said. "When it is done, it will be done tastefully."

Fuck. That.

You want "tasteful"? I've got your "tasteful" right here, pal!

Give 'em the damn rings so they can rub the Yankees' noses in it like a bunch of puppies who just peed on the rug for the third time today. Then, have a drawing to see which Red Sox player (or, better yet, lucky fan) gets to use his new hardware to stamp the phrase "NOTSOB XOS DER" into A-Fraud and Jeter's foreheads.

Once a Crybaby.

Always a crybaby.

RALEIGH, North Carolina (Reuters) - The man who finished second to Jose Canseco in voting for the 1988 American League most valuable player award says he should have the award now that Canseco is talking publicly about his steroid use.

"Where's my MVP?" former Boston Red Sox outfielder Mike Greenwell told the Fort Myers, Florida, News-Press. "(Canseco's) an admitted steroid user. I was clean."

What a whiner. The guy batted .325 with 22 home runs - decent numbers, but hardly MVP status. Kirby Puckett whupped Greenwell's ass in 1988. How he managed to rank second in the MVP balloting is a mystery to me.

It's not like it was a close vote. And I'd wager a good portion of the voters were aware (or at least had STRONG suspicions of) Canseco's steroid use.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Here's a "What If" For You

OK, everybody, hold hands. We're going to set foot into the alternate-reality universe occupied by Sarah Brady, Dianne Feinstein, and the rest of their gun-grabbing minions. It's a wonderful world where all the nasty, scary guns have magically disappeared. It should go without saying that this would be a most tranquil place, full of peace, love, and understanding - and completely devoid of all the trappings of our violent present-day society, which as we all know, are caused by the presence and easy availability of firearms.

Think about it. No more murder/suicides:

A newly divorced New Hampshire mother drowned her 6-year-old daughter in the bathtub before hanging herself in the garage Sunday night, authorities said.

No more home invasions, kidnapping, assault and battery, and aggravated rape:

UPDATE (2/18/05): Sorry, previous link NFG. Try this one.

The woman, in her 20s, told police she was getting ready to go to bed at about midnight on Feb. 3 when she noticed one of the lights in her home had been turned off. When she went to see why, a man dressed in black and wearing a ski mask grabbed her from behind, placed a hand over her mouth and threw her to the floor.

She said the attacker held a knife to her throat and took her to her bedroom, tied her to the bed, gagged her with duct tape and raped her.

And we'd finally bid adieu to domestic violence:

A man is in hospital after being hit in the head with a frozen pork chop in Queensland's south-west.

So, let's review the "weapons of choice" used in these incidents from the past week:

Violent assaults taking place with nary a gun in sight. Who knew?

Also of interest is where these stories took place: New Hampshire, Massachusetts, and Australia, three regions with (in order) increasingly stringent gun control legislation in place. Yet, each story offers a chance to poke holes in the arguments most often trotted out by the gun-grabbers and their ignorant ilk.

1. The easier it is for people to buy guns, the more likely they'll use them against a family member or themselves.

The woman in the first story lived in a state where all you need is a driver's license and a clean criminal record to pass the background check at the point of purchase, and you walk out of the store with your shiny new firearm. This was an option available to her, yet she killed her child by drowning her in the tub, then hung herself in the garage. There isn't a single piece of gun control legislation that would have prevented this tragedy.

2. Gun control disarms criminals, thereby making life safer for everyone.

The woman in the second story has the misfortune of living in Massachusetts (see 187 or so previous posts). Violent psychopath with a knife beats unarmed rape victim nearly every time. I won't say that just by having a gun, this story would have turned out differently, but the odds sure as hell would have tipped in her favor if she had access to a gun, and the training to safely operate the same.

3. Mere restrictions on gun ownership aren't enough. We need a total gun ban - you know, "for the children".

OK, so the third story is included more for comic relief, but it illustrates an important point. Australia has some of the toughest gun control laws around, including an outright ban on handgun ownership. Yet, there are thousands of everyday objects Australians can still come in contact with on a regular basis than can be used to injure or kill someone. All that's required is the criminal intent and the will to act on it - two things that cannot be legislated out of existence.

Now, if you'll excuse me I have to finish cleaning up from my killing spree last June.

UPDATE (2/18/05): Here's a prime example of what can happen when you listen to and go along with politicians who want to deprive you of the means to protect your family. All too often, we hear people on the other side of the fence saying that no one NEEDS to own guns. Sorry, but if you share living space with rabid coyotes, it would be a damn good thing to consider.

Come to think of it, this would be also one instance where having a pork chop handy might prove useful. At least it could buy you enough time to get the kids inside and get your firearm of choice from the gunsafe.

Hey, Jay

I found a nice "little" companion piece for your M1.

The Hunter Model 30S .30-Carbine Revolver by Taurus. Harry Callahan would approve.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Puttin' the 'AR' back in Barbie

Sent to me by reader, and gun nut aficionado, Alan:

That's not him in the picture. Though, come to think of it, he DID buy a pink Rick Springfield concert t-shirt in 1983.

No Argument Here

You scored as Curt Schilling. You are Curt Schilling! You are a trooper. You push yourself to the limit, regardless of any setbacks. You are also not afraid to express your opinions on a variety of topics. Very family-oriented. You're the man!!

Curt Schilling


Johnny Damon


Jason Varitek


Kevin Millar


David Ortiz


Manny Ramirez


Theo Epstein


Mark Bellhorn


Which Red Sox Player Are You?
created with

Weep Weep

Defrocked Priest to Be Sentenced Today

BOSTON - Defrocked priest Paul Shanley, one of the most recognizable figures in the Boston Archdiocese sex scandal, faces the possibility of life in prison for his conviction on child rape charges. Shanley is scheduled to be sentenced Tuesday.

But some inmate advocates say whatever term Shanley gets could amount to a death sentence.

Regardless, I'd say he's about to learn a whole new meaning of the word 'defrocked', and it's not going to be pretty (at least from where he's bent over).

Also, from the Department of Feigned Sympathy:

Michigan to cut free coffee for inmates

LANSING, Mich. -- Free coffee soon will be off the menu in Michigan's prisons. In an effort to save $250,000 this year, inmates in state prisons and people in boot camps and correctional centers won't be able to get free coffee after March 1, Corrections Department spokesman Russ Marlan said Monday.

Something tells me free coffee won't be that high on Shanley's list of priorities for the immediate future.

UPDATE: Shanley gets 12 to 15.

On its surface, I say that's pretty damn lenient. In my preferred reality-based universe, however, I don't think he'll make it 12 to 15 months before he joins now-deceased, child rapist James Porter on the rotisserie spit. Think of the cost savings for the taxpayers.

And, hey, all the more oxygen for the rest of us. It's a win-win situation.

Monday, February 14, 2005

From the Idiotic Headline Department

This isn't exactly breaking news by now, but I came across this article today on the recent mall shooting in Kingston, New York.

Summary: A guy walks into a mall, pulls out a rifle, opens fire striking several bystanders, runs out of ammunition, whereupon he is tackled and subdued by a couple mall employees, and finally taken into police custody.

Yet, the AP manages to pull this headline out of its ass?

Alleged Mall Gunman Had Columbine Interest

"Alleged"? Did they even READ their own account of the incident?

I dunno, maybe it's me. I could just be reading this wrong. Perhaps the question of whether or not the shooting occurred in an actual shopping mall has yet to be resolved.

Or maybe there are doubts as to the shooter's gender, or gender identity issues that I'm not aware of, mandating that the writer refer to him as an "alleged" gunman. Though, I have yet to hear of any women's rights groups pushing for universal application of the term "gunperson" in stories like this one.

My theory (and, as is most often the case, I'm sticking to it) is that the writer, Michael Hill, wrote the headline, "Mall Gunman Had Alleged Columbine Interest". This headline actually fits the context of the story (I know, God forbid), but also has the apparently undesired effect of downplaying any plausible connection to the Columbine shootings. And what self-respecting AP editor would allow that to happen?

A little cut-n-paste, in the name of sensationalizing the news, and there's your headline.

What's Wrong With This Sentence?

From the AP via Yahoo! News (emphasis mine):

In true punk rock fashion, Green Day tested the censors at the Grammy Awards on Sunday — and the censors were ready.

Pop Quiz Time Again

Guess which one of the following t-shirts has allegedly been removed from BodenUSA's on-line catalog after the retailer received numerous consumer complaints about its inappropriate, non-PC design.

Here's the e-mail reportedly being sent to their concerned customers:

Dear Customer

I am writing to apologise.

We feature a T shirt in our new Mini Boden catalogue with an image of a toy gun (Sheriff T Shirt). Many of you have contacted us about this.

I don't want you to think we are an irresponsible organisation. I founded this company to create clothing ranges that captured a spirit of fun, honesty, individuality and family. We have made a mistake with this product and we feel stupid, especially me. Please accept my apologies.

To be perfectly honest, I didn't give the selection of this T shirt enough thought. I have 3 girls, Anna, Kate and Stella. We don't see any guns in our household. I relied on memories of my toys when I was a boy (a long time ago) when life was a lot safer.

We have now removed the Sheriff gun T Shirt from sale in the US. However, as we print our catalogues well in advance you could receive another which still features the T shirt.

Thank you very much for letting us know how you feel. Keep the feedback coming; good or bad. It's the only way we can get better.

I am truly sorry.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours sincerely, Johnnie Boden



Post: 3580 NW 56th Street

Fort Lauderdale, FL, 33309

Tel: 1-866-206-9508

What a wuss. A few points to make here, then I'm done. First, no adult named John or Jonathan should go by the name of "Johnnie" under ANY circumstances.

Second, as a kid, Li'l Johnnie here played with (eek!) toy guns AND life was a lot safer then. That's odd. Yet somehow, the mere presence of a picture of a toy gun today is some kind of threat to society? Do these people ever actually listen to themselves?

Third, while Johnnie may be the founder of BodenUSA, it's pretty clear he isn't actually FROM the USA. His use of the words "organisation", "catalogues", and "apologise" is a pretty good indicator of this, as well as the dead giveaway at the end, "Post". I'd now like to officially revise my initial assessment of Mr. Boden from a run-of-the-mill everyday "wuss" to "full-blown, pansy-assed, eurotrash wussbag".

Now to order a couple of the racially disparaging "Navajo" design t-shirts, the marketing of which he has no apparent moral qualms over. I see they have them in my kids' size.

(link via Gunner at No Quarters)

UPDATE: Well, that took all of four seconds to confirm. Mr. Boden is a proud and obedient subject of the crime-free, "no guns allowed" United Kingdom.

Despite being burgled, twice, and on one occasion having to refinance completely, Boden has now become an established player in the upmarket mail order clothing world.

I blame all those capguns flooding the streets in the early 70's.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Our Next Governor?

Christ, I fucking hope not.

One would be hard-pressed to more accurately quantify, in ten words or less, how much of a self-serving, arrogant, statist prick Massachusetts Attorney General (and likely candidate for governor in 2006) Tom Reilly is than he himself did in this recent interview where he discussed his new-found stance on the issue of same-sex marriage. (emphasis mine)

"Once rights are given, they should not be taken away."

NEWS FLASH: Rights are not "given". They do not exist to be handed out by our elected (and unelected) officials like party favors. If you accept the premise that an entity of the government can "give" you rights, then you accept, by default, that that same entity can strip you of these rights at will.

Through his own actions and words, specifically his choice here of the word "should", Reilly has made it crystal clear he is of the belief that the "rights" of the people exist only as long as the people holding the chains of power deem it convenient for them to do so.

Thus, they cease being "rights" and become "privileges".

Make no mistakes about it. Reilly believes that some rights should be given, while others can and should be taken away. I'd cast my vote for governor for the nasty dump I took last night before I vote for this jackoff.

Satan Channels Ving Rhames

I have on good authority that somewhere in Hell, on the heels of this story hitting the news, the following conversation took place:

Satan: OK, who's next?

Minion: Defrocked priest and convicted child rapist, James Porter, sir. I started preparing his room the minute I heard he was coming. What are we going to do with him now?

Satan: What now? Let me tell you what now. I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' niggers, who'll go to work on the homes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch. You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get medieval on your ass.

While typing this, I just realized I've been blogging almost a full year without a single Pulp Fiction quote making its way onto the main page here - glad I could rectify that egregious oversight.

Keeping TAB's on things

First things first:


From the Letters to the Editor of the Brookline TAB comes this steaming pile of brain manure from one Lewis S. Dabney, a board member of Stop Handgun Violence of Newton (italics mine):

Police Chief O'Leary is right in withholding a gun license from someone with a history of anti-social behavior (page one story Feb. 3). To issue one would probably violate the Brady Law. More particularly the story contains one frequently encountered misstatement: That the former licensees were denied "..attempts to exercise the constitutional right to keep and bear arms."

No such right exists. The U.S. Supreme Court has ruled six times since 1939 that there is no individual right to own and bear arms. The Second Amendment, which at least one high court jurist has advocated repealing because it is so often misinterpreted, states that only members of a well-regulated militia have any constitutional gun right. Gun deaths in the U.S. number about 30,000 annually. About 81 percent of firearm homicides are cause by handguns. Issuing licenses for the same should be handled gingerly and sparingly, as Chief O'Leary has wisely demonstrated.

Lewis S. Dabney
Fernwood Road
Chestnut Hill
Board member, Stop Handgun Violence, Newton

Editor's note: The full text of the Second Amendment is as follows: "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

Where did you go to school, Lewis? The Michael Moore Institute of Fraudulent Fact Fucking?

Click HERE, read pages 55 through 61, then take your SIX court "rulings" and your ONE "high court jurist", and stick 'em where the sun don't shine, shithead.

Myth: The Supreme Court ruled the Second Amendment is not an individual right

Fact: The Supreme Court has never been asked to decide this issue. All court rulings to date either mention the Second amendment in passing, or as a reference to other rights.

Fact: Of 300 decisions of the federal and state courts that have taken a position on the meaning of the Second Amendment or the state analogs to it, only 10 have claimed that the right to keep and bear arms is not an individual right. Many of the other decisions struck down gun control laws because they conflicted with the Second Amendment, such as State v.Nunn (Ga. 1846).

10 out of 300? Real rock-fucking-solid argument you got going there!

Previous posts regarding the benevolent Chief O'Leary and his associates in the Brookline Police Department can be found HERE, HERE, and HERE.

One Two Three Seven Last Chances

OK, can we PLEASE just fire this arrogant and be done with it once and for all?

Lawrence superintendent faces probe: IG hoping to teach schools boss a lesson

The state Inspector General is launching a probe of the Lawrence school chief's spending as he has come under fire from his own school committee for more auto-related expenses.

Sources familiar with the probe said the office of Inspector General Gregory Sullivan is eyeing several years of expenses from the city's superintendent, Wilfredo Laboy.

"We've been spending money on things that have not been necessities," she said. "We have students that can't afford to put food on their table or books in their houses. We need to spend our money more efficiently."

No, what you need to do is send this packing. That would be a good start. The mere fact that there are taxpayers in the state who can read this and just brush it off, or worse yet, support this worthless , offends to the very core of my being.

These are the same who will flood the streets protesting anything that comes out of the Governor's office or the White House concerning education funding in this country, while this useless continues to pull down a healthy six-figure salary, choking the public chicken for every penny he can.

What a disgrace to the community he was hired to serve!

The revelation comes as Laboy yet again is coming under fire from critics such as McGovern who said the superintendent tried to pass off to taxpayers a $269 bill to install a remote starter on his city-leased Chevrolet Trailblazer.

The bill had been approved for payment by Laboy and was set to be paid until McGovern spotted what seemed to be an awfully high bill for an oil change, tire rotation and lube job. She turned the invoice over and found it also included the starter.

Laboy told her it was an oversight and promised to pay it, but McGovern found the bill on the back of an invoice that only indicated it was for an oil change, tire rotation and lube job.

Oversight, my pale white ass! you, you ! Beating you about the head and shoulders and forgetting about the shoulders part would be an "oversight".

Jay at Wizbang has more here and here.

Friday, February 11, 2005

This Is Not a Drill

From the Boston Herald earlier this week. I swear, I am not making this up.

Liberal lawmakers coming in from cold in Massachusetts House

BOSTON - A major shake-up on Beacon Hill as House Speaker Sal DiMasi announces his new leadership team.

Some of the biggest winners are liberals.

Oh, THIS doesn't bode well.

Under former House Speaker Tom Finneran, liberal lawmakers were on the political outside, with little access to the inner power circle.

(getting up off the floor)

Yeah, THAT'S been the problem all these years, a lack of liberal politicians in the Massachusetts State Legislature. It's about time those jackbooted Republican thugs hand over control of the Commonwealth. Sweet freaking mother of Joseph! What are these people smoking?

DiMasi says he's trying to create a leadership in the House as diverse as possible, both politically and geographically.

Diversifying the leadership in the House by increasing the power held by the more liberal of its members? Is this guy serious? Put down the mouthpiece, Sal, and slowly step away from the hookah.

ScrappleFace should be so satirical.

Not everyone is happy.

Can't add much to that.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

A Million 0.6 Miles Away

Following up on their earlier story (blogged here) concerning the atrocious treatment of Brookline residents by the powers that be in the Brookline Police Department, the Brookline TAB has these two articles up, that if nothing else, make me extremely grateful for the 0.6 miles separating my house from the PPSB (People's Police State of Brookline).

Try to remember, like so many situations you may find yourself in, things could ALWAYS be (slightly) worse.

Thank you to reader Seth for the links. I have GOT to start paying closer attention to shit around here. I have saved these as text files (here and here) should the links below eventually expire due to the paper's archiving of material posted on their website.

Lets begin, shall we. As difficult as this is, I will try to save space by posting here only the highlights lowlights from each article. And of course, all applicable warnings regarding breakable objects, beverages, and deceased equines are in full effect.

License too scary

Paul Theodos, a retired Boston Police officer and Searle Avenue homeowner, said (Brookline Police Sgt. Michael) Raskin made it clear upfront that that he would not be approved for a license to carry a gun when he applied in September 2002.

"[Raskin] set up a very hostile environment when I was filling out the license application," said Theodos. "He basically told me there was no way I'd get a license to carry, and that I should apply for a hunting or target practice license instead."

What better target to hone one's skills on than a carjacker?

Theodos, who says he is a veteran of "1,000 felony arrests" in his career as a cop, told the TAB a hunting gun license was essentially worthless to him.

"I know there are friends of bad guys I ran into as an officer who are still on the street. That's why I wanted a license to carry a gun ... for my own protection," said Theodos.

He withdrew the application, however, the day after meeting with Raskin because he believed the entire process would have been a waste of time. Theodos, who had received his license to carry in Boston for years before applying in Brookline, eventually did get a denial letter from his 2002 application in July 2004.

"Some of the reasons they cited had nothing to do with me ... the [denial letter] was full of lies," said Theodos.

Raskin could not be reached by the TAB for comment.

I think might a comment or two on this once my blood stops boiling and my ulcer subsides.

Gun-toting cop admitted dependence on alcohol

It is difficult to get a gun license in Brookline, even with spotless criminal records.

Difficult? Christ, that's putting it a soft spin on it.

But Brookline Police Officer Steven Kaplan was carrying a loaded 9mm Smith & Wesson hand gun, for which he was fully licensed - even though he admitted being "dependant on alcohol or drugs," when he was arrested in Framingham last month.

No need to fret, folks. I'm sure Officer Kaplan here will be treated no differently than any other ordinary citizen caught in the same circumstance. 30 bonus points to anyone who can tell me why he would admit to an alcohol dependency. That's an easy one.

Kaplan's police-issue gun was confiscated by Framingham Police and returned to the Brookline Police.

How about any personal firearms he might be keeping in his home? I'm sure they were promptly seized as well.

Should Kaplan seek or be ordered to undergo treatment for drug addiction or habitual drunkenness, he would be ineligible under state law to carry a gun for five years. His license could be restored after that period with an affidavit from a physician.

Just ask Dr. Lu, I'm sure he'd be more than happy to sign off on that one.

Kaplan's current status is unknown, but Police Chief Daniel O'Leary told the TAB recently that his department was conducting an ongoing investigation of Kaplan's arrest.

Ongoing, also known as "indefinite, never to see the light of day". And why do I have the sudden urge to fart smoke?

Once again, I would like to thank the editors at the Brookline TAB for staying on top of this story. Only from stories like this being made public, do we have half a snowball's chance in hell of anything resembling gun law reform and the restoration of all constitutional rights to the people of the Commonwealth.

Mmmmm...Thorax Cake

(link via Badpatty)

Pop Quiz

Which of the following stories will get more press coverage and spark more public outrage here in Massachusetts?

A. Healey skirts jam, sparks road rage

Lt. Gov. Kerry Healey's use of blue police lights may have helped her get through traffic last week - but it landed her in a political jam.

Stuck in stop-and-go traffic on Route 128 in Burlington last week, Healey's state police driver used blue lights to force drivers to pull aside so she could pass on her way to a speech in Newton.

B. Kennedy's `Swift' flight home costs taxpayers $2,490

WASHINGTON - Sen. Edward M. Kennedy - stirring memories of ex-Gov. Jane M. Swift's state police chopper boondoggle - ordered up a taxpayer-funded $2,490 helicopter ride home to Hyannisport last May after attending events in New Bedford, records show.


The senator's chopper ride home on May 21 to his family's famed compound allowed him to avoid the late Friday afternoon traffic congestion that clogs roadways and bridges to Cape Cod during the spring and summer weekends.

"Driving - or for that matter commercial air travel - at that time of day would have taken several lives hours," said Stephanie Cutter, a senior Kennedy adviser.

Hint: Lt. Governor Healey is a Republican, and Ted Kennedy is, well, Ted Kennedy. Also, notice how the Healey story broke the day after it happened, while it took nine months for the story of Kennedy's helicopter ride to make the local news.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Bring Out Your Dead (Horse Beating Alert)

Life goes on in the crime-free People's Utopia of Boston. Stop me if you've heard this one before.

Police arrest three teens in brutal home invasion

A pack of thieves burst into a Jamaica Plain apartment yesterday, throwing a pregnant woman to the floor, tying her up and threatening her life before making off with DVDs and assorted valuables.

"They told her to shut up or they were going to kill her and her baby," Cathy Martinez's boyfriend, Carlos Arias, said.

OK kids, for 20 bonus points, who can explain how Boston's "common-sense" gun control laws discriminate against pregnant women (or the elderly, or the poor, or the thousands of single working parents in the city, for that matter) making it impossible for them to obtain a license to purchase a firearm for defense of home and family?

The 21-year-old woman was resting about 11:30 a.m. in the apartment Arias shares with his mother, Juana Tejada, when she answered a knock at the door. The thieves stormed the place and hit Martinez.

11:30 AM on a Tuesday, hardly peak hours for criminal activity. Who wouldn't answer the door? Wake up people. Despite the never-ending blather coming out the mayor's mouth, there are people in this "safe city" of his who would end your life for ten bucks and a handful of DVD's.

The mayor knows this, yet he and our "progressive-minded" leaders insist that the most vulnerable of the state's residents (i.e. those who live where the crime is) live their lives at the mercy of these scumbags. They'll say "Just give the person what they want, and everything will be OK." or "Just don't go out at night".

Message to such minded shitheads out there: What if "what they want" is to beat you, rob you, and kill your baby at 11:30 in the fucking morning?

And why would anyone in a position of power in their community willingly create an environment that deprives the most law-abiding of its citizens of the right to life and liberty, while it actively bestows the right to the pursuit of happiness upon the most violent of criminals?

Oh yeah, I forgot. It's "for the children". Silly me.

Gun-Fearing Wussy follow-up question: But what would you have everyone do? Answer the door with a gun in their hand?

My answer: YES.

In the dead-heat of a summer's night, two teenagers labored to dig a grave near an abandoned home in Vershire, Vermont. Robert Tulloch and James Parker had already targeted their victim, a homeowner who lived a few blocks away. They'd never even met the man. But his house sat in a prosperous-looking neighborhood on Goose Green Road, and the cars outside were new and expensive. They planned to rob and kill him, then bury him in the grave they'd prepared.


They'd rehearsed for days. Now was the time to put their plan into action. Tulloch planned to tell the homeowner that his car had broken down. He would ask to use the telephone and, once inside, would pull his knife and subdue the victim. When all was clear, Parker would enter the house and the two would force the man to give up his credit cards and PIN numbers. Then they would kill him. If there was a wife and children at home, so be it--they'd have to die, too. "No witnesses," Tulloch had said.

But when the intended victim answered the door, the master criminals were surprised. He was obviously suspicious and held a handgun in plain view.

Tulloch stammered out some lame excuse for interrupting the man, then quickly left. Parker exited the bushes, tucked his tail between his legs, and also fled.

Because the homeowner was armed, the Vershire murder didn't happen.

And because the homeowner lived in Vermont, he was able to purchase and carry his gun with just a valid photo ID and a quick background check at the point of purchase as required by federal law.

Sadly, the teens' next victims, Dartmouth professors Half and Suzanne Zantop wouldn't be so fortunate. They were brutally stabbed to death by the pair of deranged teenagers.

The Zantop's lived in New Hampshire, a state with (what I would consider) common-sense gun laws, at least in comparison to this lovely place we call Massachusetts. They chose, however, not to arm themselves, and paid the price. It seems Mayor Menino and the assclown legislators of the Commonwealth don't want us "common folks" to have that choice.

This same body of "progressive" politicians will fight tooth and nail to defend Ms. Martinez's right to abort her pregnancy, but somehow believe they are more qualified to choose how she gets to protect the lives of her children once they are born.

They choose to have her scream "Please don't hurt me!" to an armed gang of assailants . Bad choice, just ask the Zantop's.

I Guess It's True

The acorn lugnut doesn't fall far from the tree Oldsmobile.

UPDATE: A thousand words, or so they say.

Charlie Rangel, Hillary Clinton, Margaret Cho,
and good old Patches Kennedy himself.
No further explanation required.

Get Yours Today

Gravatars are here! Now your only problem is creating one that best represents your personality. It should be something that can reproduce well when shrunk down to 80x80 pixels, or as small as 30x30 pixels, as they appear in Haloscan comments here.

Here are some of the ideas I've come up with:

Decisions, decisions.

Freedom, Genocide, What's The Difference?

From reader Dan:

Youth defends prize-winning Bush/Hitler art

Jeffrey Eden devised his award-winning project less than 30 minutes after his high school art teacher asked him to express a thought or two in a three-dimensional way.

So, in the wake of last year's polarizing election [ed: as opposed to the elections won by B.J. Clinton with less than 50% of the popular vote, or the Iraqi elections where people of Iraq literally risked their lives in the name of freedom] and the war in Iraq, the 17-year-old built an abstract scene comparing President Bush's war policies with Adolf Hitler's pillage of Europe.

Ah yes, the similarities are glaring.

The student's diorama-like assemblage juxtaposes Hitler quotes with statements by Mr. Bush, Nazi swastikas with American flags, desert-colored toy soldiers with olive plastic figures. And so on.

Eden said he's trying to point out certain similarities between the U.S.-led war in Iraq and the German blitzkrieg -- without actually equating Hitler to President Bush.

Um, sure, whatever you say, kid. Our tax dollars once again hard at work in our public schools.

In this, the success of his project is debatable.

Nonetheless, it has earned the Charlestown student a silver key at the Rhode Island Scholastic Art Awards.

It has also tested the contest's commitment to an overriding principle: that students should be encouraged to express their own thoughts through art.

The piece, titled "Bush/Hitler and How History Repeats Itself," triggered a complaint soon after it was displayed with other award-winning entries at Alperts Furniture Showplace in Seekonk last week.

But he's not equating Bush to Hitler, mind you. He's only equating Bush's ideology, words, and actions with those of Hitler. Well, thanks for clearing that up, kid.

"It's offensive to me," said Paul Lewis, a 34-year-old North Providence man.

Lewis asked Alperts to remove Eden's piece and phoned area newspapers as well as Channel 10 and Channel 6.

He said he sees zero relationship between the policies of President Bush and Hitler.

"It's a stretch," he said.

Gee, ya think?

Lewis said the piece poorly conveys what Eden told The Journal he was trying to convey because it leaves too much to interpretation. Someone might think the artist believes the president is as evil as Hitler, he said.

"I believe he should have been a lot more clear in putting those two things together," Lewis said.

Alperts refused to remove the exhibit, but the store did attach a disclaimer.

The views of the artist do not represent the store, it said.

"We don't censor art," said the store's owner, Hershel Alpert. "We're not in the business of censoring art."

Eden hopes to study art after he graduates from Chariho Regional High School next year.

Eden said that although he supports U.S. soldiers, he believes the invasion of Iraq was unjustified.

The recent election in Iraq has not changed his views.

No shit. The election in Iraq reflected favorably on the policies of the Bush administration. I wouldn't expect it to bring about any change in the way members of the Rabid Bush Haters Society feel. If they were to allow rational discourse to influence their opinions (God forbid), they'd become independent thinkers and have their RBHS membership privileges revoked.

"At the time we invaded we did not have the justification nor the intelligence to take him [Saddam Hussein] out the way we did," he said.

If you're referring to the fact that we took him alive, I might be inclined to agree with you on this one.

Figures of President Bush and Hitler, drawn on Popsicle sticks, are at the focal point of Eden's work. Each is addressing his own army of plastic soldiers.

On a backdrop, Eden has pasted statements of Hitler. He has penned a few of his own sentiments, too.

He hopes people will read them.

"Hitler's own justification was his own hatred," said one slogan.

Yeah, all Bush had to back up his plans were a laundry list of violated UN resolutions, the approval of the United States Congress, and the support of allies across the globe - flimsy.

"Treatment of the prisoners was unspeakable [concentration camps]," said another.

But did Hitler put panties on their heads before breaking out the Zyklon-B? Because THAT would have been just AWFUL.

To the right of President Bush, Eden's handwriting said "No justification" and "Saddam had no affiliation with the Taliban and there are no weapons of mass destruction."

Eden said the written messages are as important as the visual ones.

He thinks they show that the work is comparing Hitler and President Bush -- not equating them.

Well, I'll be crystal-clear, Jeffrey. I'm not comparing you to an uneducated, ignorant, leftist asshat, I'm equating you to one.

"I felt I was clear about what I was trying to get across," he said. "I believe those who misconstrued the artwork didn't take the time to really read into it."

His teacher, Lynn Norton, believed he got his point across. She gave him an A.

An "A"? Content and controversy aside, this thing's a piece of junk. I can crap better art than this.

UPDATE: Michelle Malkin has more.

From the Killing Fields of Vermont

Jeff over at Alphecca has the latest Weekly Check on the Bias post up. This is a series of posts where Jeff looks at the media's "fair and balanced" reporting (or lack thereof) on gun-related stories in the news - always a good read, and he's got excellent taste in links.

OK, Forget the Drunk Tank

What we need is a "stupid tank", a place to lock up ignorant, snotty-assed kids (like this guy and his Rhodes scholar girlfriend) until they smarten up. Granted, that might take a while, but I don't think society would be any worse for the wear in the interim.

Too much fun, too much booze, and too many suburban truants added up to a lot of snowballs, a spate of brawls, 37 arrests and a police sweep before the 2005 Patriots Super Bowl celebration officially could be called over.


Despite repeated loudspeaker calls for the crowd to go home, some didn't get the message. One Brookline youth was arrested for throwing a snowball at the cops, and his friend narrowly avoided arrest as she argued with police.

"He didn't even hit the cop!" said Vena Priestly, 17 of Brookline. "It's unacceptable how they are treating us! Treat us with respect, and we'll treat them with respect! They're not even saying please!"

Words fail me.

I sincerely hope these kids do not accurately reflect on the caliber of students and graduates being churned out by the public schools in the enchanted village of Brookline, but I have my doubts.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

It Was Christmas Eve, Babe... the drunk tank.*

A city councilor wants to bring back the so-called "drunk tank" to force drunken drivers - and possibly other boozed-up scofflaws - to sleep off their buzz.

"Why are we releasing people who are impaired?" City Councilor Rob Consalvo said. "They're a danger to themselves and they're a danger to society."

The proposed law would require drunken drivers to stay in jail for eight hours or until they blow below a .05 on the Breathalyzer.

The law is aimed at preventing drunk drivers from getting behind the wheel after they are bailed out. Another city law bars drunken drivers from retrieving their car until the day after their arrest. Consalvo is considering extending the proposed law to cover anyone arrested for an alcohol-related offense.

To quote my favorite Bay State senator - BRING IT ON! Then bring back the chain gangs to get rid of the rest of this damn snow.

*apologies to Shane

Twinkies Save Lives

I mean, come on, if they can save just ONE life...

LAUREL HILL, Fla. -- A few extra pounds may have saved James "Bubba" Taylor's life. The boy, who turns 9 on Tuesday, avoided serious injury after being struck by a .38-caliber bullet during a target-shooting accident, officials said.

"He's a little chunky," his grandmother, Alice Harper, told the Northwest Florida Daily News for its Tuesday editions. "Thank God."

Taylor was shot Saturday by a neighbor, James Hinshaw, 44, who was practicing marksmanship with the child. The bullet entered Taylor's right side, and traveled through his flesh without striking any organs. [emphasis mine]

Well, you can't argue the idiot doesn't need practice.

Taylor was taken by helicopter to a hospital, where he was treated and released the same day. The Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office is classifying the incident as an accident.

Accident? Sorry, not buying that - try "gross negligence" or "reckless conduct". And who knows, maybe if the kid wasn't so fat (smaller target), the bullet would have missed him altogether.

Monday, February 07, 2005

I'll Bring the Rope

Here's some more dirt on our friend, Brookline Police Chief Daniel O'Leary (see this previous post),and his cronies on the Brookline P.D.

If these two posts don't exemplify everything that is wrong with Massachusetts' discretionary firearms licensing regulations, nothing will. Be warned, the "Remove All Breakables Before Reading" warning is turned up to 11 for this one. In fact, don't even read this. I don't want to be held responsible in any way for anyone's subsequent actions.

A few years back, ol' Danny Boy was named as a defendant (well, color me surprised) in a civil action brought by a police officer in his department alleging, among other things:

Dirrane's complaints ranged from minor to quite serious. His initial complaints, which started in 1992, were relatively minor; he claimed that certain officers were playing cards during work hours, that his supervisors had improperly waived firearm licensing requirements, and that the accounting safeguards in his unit were inadequate. He then started to make more serious allegations charging Heavey and the other officer in the unit with falsifying fingerprint reports and destroying fingerprint evidence. He alleged that Heavey instructed him to falsify reports as well. He also continued to make less serious complaints, objecting to the manner in which evidence was stored and logged in the unit.

What? Corruption and fraud in the hallowed halls of the Brookline Police Department? I'm shocked, I tell you! Simply shocked! MUCH more here:

In December of 1992, Dirrane was named investigator of the year by his peers in the Brookline Detective Bureau. During the party, Hayes Was accompanied by a friend, John Henry Williams. Williams is the son of baseball legend Ted Williams and the Manager of Grand Slam Productions, a business that specialized in sports collectibles and memorabilia.

Also during the party, Hayes was displaying a large framed photograph of Ted Williams taken in his younger playing days. Hayes stated that Williams had given the photograph to him and that it was going to be personalized and autographed by Ted Williams.

Within days of the party, Hayes brought Williams to the Identification Bureau and stated that Williams was going to apply for a License to carry a concealed weapon. Hayes instructed Dirrane that he was waiving the fees, investigation, range qualifying and that he wanted a license issued to Williams immediately.

Dirrane informed Hayes that he could not do that, that it violated virtually all of the firearms licensing rules.

Hayes stated that he was not asking but ordering Dirrane to issue the license. Dirrane repeated that he would not comply with his order. Hayes threatened Dirrane with transfer in an outburst filled with profanities and stormed out of the Identification Bureau. Hayes and Williams returned a short while later, met with Heavey and the license was issued.

Additionally, Hayes instructed property Officer Carroll to escort Williams to AAA police supply and assist Williams in purchasing a weapon. This escort occurred while Carroll was on duty and used a Department vehicle.

In January of 1993, Chief Brackett instructed Dirrane to bring the Williams license file to his office. Once in the office Brackett asked Dirrane if proper procedures were followed during the issuing of the Williams license. Dirrane stated that Brackett should check with Hayes and Heavey, that they had issued the license. Brackett stated that he wanted the information from Dirrane and that he didn't believe Hayes or Heavey would be truthful.

Fast-forward four years:

Later on April 17, 1997, at approximately 5 PM, Dirrane was visited at his home by Detective Lieutenant Morgan and Internal Affairs Lieutenant Burke. Morgan and Burke stated that they had been ordered by O'Leary to confiscate Dirrane's keys to his desk, keys to the office, keys to the evidence room, keys to the computer and any other Brookline Police Department keys.

Morgan and Burke also ordered Dirrane to surrender his License to carry firearms, firearms identification card and all firearms that Dirrane possessed.

Dirrane complied with all requests. Morgan and Burke inquired what had occurred, and were informed by Dirrane that he had reported misconduct by Heavey and that he was immediately threatened by Heavey. Dirrane stated that due to this improper intimidation, he suffered from a severe anxiety attack and acting on the advise of an attorney, reported sick on duty.

Morgan and Burke stated that O'Leary was concerned for Dirrane's welfare and had ordered the confiscation of any firearms.

I retract my statement from my earlier post. A swift kick in the nuts is too good for these corrupt pieces of shit. And spare me any of the usual "innocent until proven guilty" horseshit. These guys are dirtier than a five-dollar whore's mattress after shore leave.

Sorry, Kim, but "Red Curtain of Blood" doesn't even begin to cover this.

Back to the present now, here's the chief in his own words (from the Brookline Police Department website):

Part of our mission is to work with our community to prevent problems or to solve them before they negatively impact a person's quality of life.

I'm afraid to ask what the other parts are.

And from the department's list of "values":

Build partnerships with citizens in order to ensure personal safety, protect individual rights, protect property, and promote individual responsibility and community commitment.



I really wish I had dug all this up prior to my trip to the range on Sunday. Oh, well, guess I gotta go back (shucks). I still have a handful of unused guest passes - any takers?

Upon Reflection - Vol. 6

On Convenience Store Ethics

Time and place: Davis Square Store 24, Somerville, Massachusetts - August 1988 (night shift)

It seemed innocent enough - a residentially-challenged individual purchasing a bottle of rubbing alcohol. From the looks of things, a little disinfecting wouldn't have been the worst fate to have befallen him that night. But when he asked where the cups were (I politely directed him toward the coffee counter), I probably should have brought that particular transaction to a premature end.