Friday, June 30, 2006

Off For the Weekend

If you need to reach me, try here or here.

See you in a few.

Coco Bleepin' Crisp

(Boston Globe Staff Photo / Jim Davis)

Couldn't let the day end without posting this.

UPDATE: Reader Weebs (aka: Mr. Weebles) has the link to the video of the catch.

Double-Dose of Happy Endings

Boy, this has been a tough couple of days for shotgun-wielding scumbags in the Land of Lincoln.

Shotgun-wielding intruder shot, killed in Bridgeport

A would-be burglar was shot to death Wednesday evening during a confrontation with a homeowner in the city's Bridgeport neighborhood, Chicago Police said.

It was just after 5 p.m. when the homeowner arrived at his home in the 1600 block of West 38th Place, said police officer John Mirabelli.

He parked his car in the garage, got out and as he was walking to the rear was confronted by a man armed with a shotgun.

The two got into a physical fight and at one point the shotgun went off; the intruder suffered a fatal gunshot wound to the head, according to police reports.

The 44-year-old man, whom authorities weren't identifying until family had been notified, was pronounced dead on the scene.

Shotgun blast during robbery leaves attacker, 16, dead

A 16-year-old youth was fatally wounded early Thursday in what police said was a struggle over a shotgun among three young robbers and their intended target.

Police said Monte Golliday and two companions had approached a man, 38, about 1:15 a.m. Thursday in front of his home in the 4900 block of Jeannie Place.

One of Golliday's companions pointed a shotgun at the man, said Illinois State Police Master Sgt. James Morissey. In an ensuing struggle, the shotgun discharged, striking Golliday in the abdomen.

I love the quote from one of the ex-scumbag's neighbors:

That's horrible for such a young life to be taken away so soon.

Yeah, he never got a chance to actually kill someone.

Quel dommage.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

I Was NOT Expecting This

Marine Sgt. Daniel Cotnoir ACQUITTED

SALEM, Mass. --A jury deliberated just two hours Thursday before finding an Iraq war veteran acted in self-defense when he fired a shotgun into a group of club-goers outside his Lawrence home, injuring two people.

The Salem Superior Court jury acquitted Marine Sgt. Daniel Cotnoir, a 34-year-old reservist named last year's "Marine of the Year," of two counts of assault and battery with a dangerous weapon in the shooting last August.

Cotnoir, a married father with two young daughters, had rejected an earlier plea deal. He could have faced up to 20 years in prison. He stood stoically and showed no emotions as the verdicts were read.

New Hampshire: It's "For the Children"TM


For 4th year in a row, NH tops to raise kids

Despite a significant jump in its percentage of poor children...

Note: the article then goes on to mention eight paragrphs later that "New Hampshire still has the lowest rate of child poverty in the country".

...New Hampshire led the nation in the annual Kids Count report on health and well-being of children and teenagers.

In the interest of saving time, I'll just link to last year's post on this topic.

Complete state rankings here. Note that the People's Compassionate Progressive Republic of Massachusetts, the "For the Children"TM capital of the free world, dropped four spots on the list - no doubt, it's all Mitt Romney's fault.

If This is What They Mean By "Progressive"...

...I'll pass, thanks.

I can't say this news is all that surprising, coming from the state that advertises to illegal aliens everywhere that, not only will they not be approached, questioned, arrested, or even looked at funny by anyone involved in law enforcement (including our illustrious Attorney General), but they'll also be given "free" healthcare, drivers licenses, college tuition discounts, food stamps, and high-paying jobs on state-funded construction projects.*

Most New England states can expect declines in the percentage of young workers holding bachelor's degrees or higher, with the steepest drops expected in Massachusetts and Connecticut, researchers conclude in a study commissioned by the Nellie Mae Education Foundation.

The "New England 2020" report attributes the decline primarily to population growth among young minorities outpacing gains by majority whites, and a widening education attainment gap between minorities and whites, who are more likely to complete college.

And, also more likely (as has been amply demonstrated by recent US Census reports) to relocate to states where they feel their tax dollars will be used in a manner more according to their wishes.

However, the minority population gains and an influx of immigrants are expected to help offset another negative trend: an expected decline in the population of working-age New England residents. Growth in nonwhite populations will help supply the region with the workers it needs as the population ages and more people retire [read: flee - ed.], Coelen said.

You throw in an increase to the minimum wage, as yet another incentive toward not getting an education (why bother?), and you've got another sure-fire recipe for liberal "success" on your hands. Of course, as I'm wont to say, it all depends on your definition of "success".

To paraphrase Ray Liotta's character, Shoeless Joe Jackson, from Field of Dreams:

"If you give it away for "free", they will come."

* This post brought to you this morning by the mAss Backwards Department of Run-On Sentences.

UPDATE: Case in point.

If you give it away for free...

Under its customer bill of rights, the T grants refunds to riders when service is 30 minutes late...

...they will come.

MBTA police have uncovered hundreds of thousands of dollars in fraud by scofflaw riders who submitted heaps of phony refund requests on behalf of deceased relatives, unwitting friends and even a pet golden retriever named Max, T officials said.

The extent of the fraud - committed in the absence of any checks on abuse - shocked T officials, who became concerned after a preliminary review showed the agency’s on-time guarantee was being targeted by con artists.

"We are finding rampant abuse of the system," T General Manager Daniel Grabauskas said yesterday. "People were putting in refunds for dead parents, their dogs and their kids."

"Well, golly, we had a system in place to hand out free money, with no questions asked, and some folks decided to take advantage of that. We here at the MBTA are shocked, we tell you, shocked."

Welcome to Massachusetts.

Pedro Channels U2

"A Sort Of Homecoming"


On that happy note, please welcome Mets fan (hey, we all make bad choices in life) JP, of Resurgemus to the blogroll.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Wednesday's "One For the Ladies"

I think if I was posting personals on 15 years ago, I suspect they'd have gone something like this.

Don't Drink? Get lost! - 25

There's something about the sober crowd and their holier than thou attitude and pretentious manner of ordering their "coke with ice" that irritates me.

I'm 25. I drink wine, scotch, and shitty beer when I'm feeling like a commoner.

Some ground rules:

- No married women. You dames are out of control on this site..
- No Fat chicks. "HE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT!!" Yes he did.
- No children. I'm referring to your personality, little girl. Can't handle a joke? Do you think sentences beginning with "So this black guy I know" are racist? Grow up.
- If you take yourself too seriously, we won't get along.
- If you take ME too seriously, we DEFINITELY won't get along.
- If you are a vegetarian, we ABSOLUTELY won't get along.
- If you say words like "irregardless" or "synergy"...first off, I'll fucking spit on you, and then I'll inform you how we probably won't get along.

Mumbling On

First up, a little vocabulary primer:

EDICT (noun): A decree or proclamation issued by an authority and having the force of law.

EVERY (adjective): Constituting each and all members of a group without exception.

IMMIGRANT (noun): A person who leaves one country to settle permanently in another.

Got it? Good.

Now, from the Boston Herald:

Mayor Thomas M. Menino's rejection of Gov. Mitt Romney's offer to deploy state police in the city's bullet-scarred neighborhoods has racheted up the debate over illegal immigration.

The mayor says state cops don't know Hub streets and he doesn't want Romney using them to enforce immigration laws as the governor has indicated he wants to do.

"Gov. Romney's new edict to stop every immigrant out there is a problem," Menino said of the governor's plan to give troopers the power to detain immigration violators.

Excuse me, Mr. Mayor, but do you have any proof, whatsoever, that the Governor ever issued or intended to issue such a proclamation? I've searched everywhere, and I can't find one iota of evidence that would back up such a blatantly misleading statement.

"His stance on immigrants is troublesome to me. Boston is a city of immigrants."

The reason that's so "troublesome" to you, Tom, is that for those of you suffering from chronic rectal-cranial inversion, there's no difference between a LEGAL immigrant and an ILLEGAL immigrant.

From where I'm sitting, the "problem" we're facing here is a mayor with a penchant for blurring reality by spewing lies such as this, which serve but two purposes; (1) they allow him to score cheap political points by labeling his opponents as racist xenophobes, (2) they make it impossible for any meaningful (read: reality-based) dialogue on the issue of illegal immigration to take place on his watch.

Tell me, Mr. Mayor, shall I await your retraction and apology, or just go ahead and call you out as the disgraceful, sorry excuse of a leader you have, once again, shown yourself to be?

(link via reader Jim)

Call Me Cold and Heartless

...but, the first thing I thought of when I read this story was the Play-Doh Fun Factory I had when was a kid.

600 lbs. woman survives getting thrown through sunroof

(link via Drudge)

George W. Bono

Video of President Bush singing Sunday Bloody Sunday.

Rock on, dude.

(link via Wizbang)

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Rule #4

Be sure of your target, and what's beyond.

A man who committed suicide at a party also killed a 16-year-old girl when the bullet traveled through his head and struck her in the chest, authorities said.

Fuckin' dumbass.

Postal Match, Anyone?

Time's Up!

UPDATE: After you're done with that one, try the F.U.N. target here.

Both of these are sure to carry the highly sought-after "Jay G. Stamp of Approval" for all your shooting enjoyment needs.

Rest in Peace, Acidman

What he said.

It's "For the Children" (cont'd)


As a reward for outstanding academic achievement, over 100 Boston Public School students received new bicycles and helmets. The Boston Police Athletic League (PAL) funded this initiative as a way of congratulating the students for their 100% attendance record. Youth Service Officers from each of the 11 police districts have worked closely with each of these dedicated pupils since the beginning of the school year.

Seems like a great program, right? Rewarding kids for their relentless pursuit of outstanding academic achievement - who could argue the merits of such a plan?


From the Center for Disease Control's WISQARS (Web-based Injury Statistics Query and Reporting System) website:

The number of injuries, of all intents, for kids 5 to 14, in the year 2004 (excluding those cases where the injured were "treated and released"):

Bicycle-related = 10,763
Firearms-related = 1,068 2004 (the latest year for which data is available) bicycle-related injuries sent our kids to the emergency room at a rate 10-times greater than injuries caused by firearms. Yet, here we have the Boston Police Department just handing out these dangerous child-maiming devices ... to our children!!!

For the love of God, have we gone mad???

"OK, but how many kids are killed by guns, compared to bikes, every year?"

Well, let's see.

Using 2003 (again, latest year with data available), for the same age groups, we find the following fatality rates:

Cycling-related = 125
Firearms-related = 324

"AH-HA! Got you!", screamed the gun-fearing liberal.


But, whatever happened to "IF IT SAVES JUST ONE LIFE!"?

And, in an age where bicycles are being used in our city with increasing regularity in the commission of violent crimes...

A 60-year-old woman had a heart attack after she was mugged in South Boston Thursday morning.

A man on a bike tried to take her bag at the intersection of West 5th and D Street around 5:15 a.m.

A 17-year-old Acton, Mass., man was arrested after he allegedly threw a 10-speed bicycle off the roof of a three-story apartment building, hitting and seriously injuring a woman on the sidewalk below.

The shooting took place outside 38 Paul Place in the South End just after 10 p.m. on July 28. Witnesses said two boys on BMX bicycles with hoods pulled tight around their faces rode up into Castle Square and fired, spraying the corner with bird shot.

Sierra will be charged with first-degree murder as an adult while a second teen, whose name has not been released, is being charged as a juvenile. The pair were spotted fleeing the scene on separate bicycles... we really want to be providing our young people with such easy access to these crime-causing implements? Clearly, what's needed here is some kind of bike buyback program to get these things "off the streets" before anyone else gets hurt or killed.


Editor's Note: The preceding post was brought to you today by the joint venture of the "Tongue-in-Cheek Humor Department" and the "My Statistics Can Beat Up Your Statistics Society". So relax - I think it's fucking awesome that these kids all got new bikes.

Monday, June 26, 2006

50 Bucks is 50 Bucks, eh?

So, I drove up to Lynn, Lynn, the City of Sin after work yesterday to buy an 8-gun cabinet listed for sale on The seller wanted 50 bucks for it, and said it was in good shape. When I got there, he threw two boxes of .38 Special semi-wadcutters and one box of .357 hollowpoints into the equation, at no additional cost, and the deal was done.

OK, so I don't even own a .38 or a .357 wheelgun...yet. But, what was I supposed to do? Say no to the free ammo? Surely, you jest.

Anyway, here it is, now housing the Remington 870 from last year's evil gun show in New Hampshire, and the newly-scoped 10/22. I'd say I did OK for the price.

Here are a couple close-ups of the interior. I'll be building a better barrel rest with a couple offset rests for scoped rifles. Not to mention, doing something about the six empty slots (and the dearth of ammo therein).

Now, to find a minute (or 240) of free time to get to the range.

I Guess It All Depends...

...on your definition of "working".

Boston Mayor Tom Menino:

The gun buyback program is working[.]

The firearms we'’re receiving are exactly the type of guns we'’re looking for: working firearms with the potential to do serious harm.

Like my Jeep, which has "the potential" to go 110 miles an hour straight into a crowd of pedestrians? Or my Sawzall, which has "the potential" to dismember the next stranger to ring my doorbell? Or a pointy stick, which...

But, I digress.

From the same Boston Herald story:

"We want to get the firearms off our street that are causing the violence, and as you can see on the table in front of me, we are getting those guns," said Deputy Superintendent Darren Greeley.

Gee, what's wrong with that sentence? More to the point, what's wrong with these people? Do I even have to ask? Needless to say, no bonus points will be awarded for getting those right. I guess they think that if they repeat it often enough, it will eventually become reality.

"Guns kill. Guns kill. Guns kill." (repeat as needed)

A gleaming stainless steel Beretta 9 mm sat next to a rusted, taped up .25-caliber "Saturday Night Special." There was even a Civil War replica black-powder revolver that was still capable of sending a lead ball charging through advancing cavalry or an enemy on the street.

Much in the same way that scalpels and forceps are capable of performing open-heart surgery, I suppose. Did this person go to journalism school to learn how to write like this?

And, I had no idea so many drug dealers and gangbangers in town were into black powder pistol shooting. I mean, it's not exactly the most efficient weapon for "hosing down" your competition in "fusillades of bullets".

Meanwhile, on the reality-laden streets of Boston this weekend...

Police Investigate Deadly Dorchester Shooting

A shooting in Dorchester Saturday night has turned into a death investigation.

According to police, the victim, who is being described as a black male, was shot several times at Levant and Tebroc Streets.

Two People Shot In Boston's South End

Police say a 12-year-old boy was one of the two people shot in front of a Store 24 in the South End.

The shooting occurred around midnight at the corner of Washington Street and Mass. Ave. Police say the second shooting victim is a 24-year-old man.

I hope the police are able to apprehend and punish the objects used to commit these acts of violence. Because, they don't seem that interested in (read: capable of) doing the same for the violence-prone individuals involved.

And, by the way, the gun buyback program has a blog.

Comments are moderated (duh!), so good luck with that.

UPDATE: Another shooting on the streets of Boston's South End this weekend - this time with a unique twist - the police have arrested the shooter!

Two teens under arrest in South End shooting

Two 15-year-old boys are under arrest this morning, charged in connection with the killing of a 19-year-old man in the South End late last night, authorities said.

Bad gun!

The shooting occurred shortly before midnight at the corner of Shawmut Avenue and Dwight Street. It was unclear how many times the victim was shot. Investigators would not comment on a motive.

A spokesman for the Suffolk District Attorney's office said Eloy Sierra is charged with murder and illegal possession of a firearm and is to be arraigned today in Boston Municipal Court.

Presumably, the police now have the firearm responsible for this crime in custody - case closed. So why bother charging this poor, misunderstood youth with any crime here? Everyone knows it was the gun who orchestrated and carried out this act of violence. [/moron]

I Guess It All Depends...

...on your definition of "progressive".

From the Boston Globe:

How embarrassing is this? Pro-environment, green-thinking Massachusetts has virtually shut the door to alternative energy developers such as Cape Wind. Meanwhile, oil-loving, redneck Texas is poised to build the nation's largest wind farm. Most of our local political establishment has united in opposition to wind. At the same time, Lone Star politicians are spearheading what they call the "Texas wind rush" in the Gulf of Mexico. Massachusetts was once in the fore-front of developing renewable energies. By the end of this year, Texas will probably be the number one source of wind power in the United States.

I can already hear the chants coming from the "We'll never be happy as long as Republicans are allowed to breathe" society:

"Evil, greedy wind corporations!"
"Fight Big Wind!"
"No blood for wind!"

Feel free to add your own.

John Calaway, head of Superior, recalls a "scouting mission" to the Berkshires several years ago. Local leaders told him it would be difficult to get the necessary permits, and Calaway mentioned how receptive Texas was to his plans. "'Boy,' I was told, 'you're not in Texas' - and that sent me running." Massachusetts, he tells me, no longer interests him. "Why would we waste our time?"


It's an old story. Businesses and investors go to places that want them, where the rules are predictable and local government supportive. don't say.

Still, that prompts the question, why are we so difficult? Leadership is one factor. [State Land Commissioner Jerry] Patterson sees wind as Texas's future - "recognizing that oil and gas will someday go away, we need to diversify our portfolio," he said at his recent press conference - and in his position as land commissioner, he controls most of the decisions relating to state lands and coastal waters. In Massachusetts, meanwhile, Ted Kennedy - the state's most powerful pol - adamantly opposes Cape Wind.

To the proponents of wind power here in Massachusetts, I'd say this - don't let this setback worry you too much right now. One just needs to recognize that (to paraphrase Mr. Patterson there) Ted Kennedy, too, will someday go away.

There are ironies here, too. Patterson built his reputation on the Second Amendment - it was his legislation that let Texans carry concealed weapons - but here he is, on the side of the crunchies. The great liberal Kennedy, meanwhile, may be wind power's most visible opponent nationwide.

That's ironic? It seems to me that Patterson's shown himself to be consistently on the side of doing what's in the best interest of the people he represents, unlike a certain aforementioned senator.

That's not irony. That's just how it is.

Granted, I would never expect Massachusetts to be high on the list of locations where wind-based energy firms would want to set up shop, especially when compared to a state like Texas. There's the simple matter of geography to deal with. More open space = more money.

But, the irony of the Bay State being "out-progressived" by Texas, of all places, sure tastes good this morning.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Compare and Contrast

Boston, MA:

Two Boston police officers have been suspended but no arrests have been made after one of the cops allegedly shot the other in an argument over whether the shooter was capable of driving following a night of boozing in Dorchester, investigators and sources told the Herald.

Warren, MA:

A Warren police sergeant is facing charges that he pointed a gun on a colleague.

A criminal complaint has been issued against Sgt. Jeffrey Y. Bednarz, 27, charging him with one count of assault with a dangerous weapon after a show-cause hearing Thursday.

That breathing sound you hear is me not holding my breath.

Two Down, One To Go

On Friday, the Weaver "Tip-Off" scope mount base, which I bought on eBay for the 10/22, arrived. Fortunately, the small screwdriver on the Swiss Army knife was a perfect fit for the screws, seeing how my small screwdriver set was nowhere to be found.

Not that you can even see it in this picture, but do I really need another excuse for posting one?

(click for a slightly larger pic)
Five bonus points for every CD in the rack
that you can identify in the background.

Yesterday, the also-eBay-purchased .22 bore snake arrived, and I was able to give the barrel a good cleaning. No buyer's regret with this rifle! The bore is smooth as glass.

Lastly, the UPS website package tracking tells me the Simmons 22 MAG 4x32 scope I ordered (yes, via eBay) will be delivered tomorrow.

God, someone better keep me away from eBay for a while, or there'll be no college money for the girls. 'Cause I fear I'm just gettin' warmed up.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Yeah, Here's a Shocker

The Boston Herald has a follow-up piece to the story they broke on Friday, regarding the Boston police officer who "allegedly" shot a fellow cop who was trying to stop him from driving drunk after a long night of drinking and bar-hopping.

From Friday's Boston Herald:

A Boston police officer sent a .40-caliber round speeding through the hip of a fellow officer early yesterday morning in West Roxbury as the two argued over whether he was sober enough to drive, sources said.

My response at the time:

If I had spent the better part of the evening getting shit-faced and driving drunk around the city, while carrying a loaded gun, and then decided, at 4:30 in the morning, to shoot a cop who was trying to prevent me from driving any further, I suspect I'd be looking at some serious jail time.

But, then again, I'm just an ordinary citizen.


I'm seeing a lengthy "investigation" on the horizon, the final write-up of which will likely contain the phrases "accidentally discharged", and "the gun, which Officer _______ believed to be unloaded, then went off", and one asshole cop submitting to drug and alcohol counseling in a union-approved method of job/pension/gun rights preservation - a nice little "get out of jail free" card, unavailable to us mere mortals.

Tell me I'm way off base here.


The Boston Herald today:

Two Boston police officers have been suspended but no arrests have been made after one of the cops allegedly shot the other in an argument over whether the shooter was capable of driving following a night of boozing in Dorchester, investigators and sources told the Herald.

Forgive me for repeating myself, but if that were you or I who did this, we'd be under arrest, held without bail, and stripped of our "rights" to ever own a firearm for as long as we live faster that you could say "Holy double fucking standard, Batman!".

"An investigation will determine whether the officer who fired will be charged,"” said Suffolk District Attorney'’s Office spokesman David Procopio, the first official to confirm the cop-on-cop shooting scenario.


Durkin allegedly drove away after the shooting, leaving Behnke'’s wife, a nurse, to drive him to the hospital for treatment.

Let's see...he was carrying a loaded firearm (and driving) while intoxicated. He shot a police officer. And, he fled the scene of the shooting (without rendering first aid...what a guy!). Gee, are these even crimes we can prosecute here in Massachusetts? There have been so many changes to the laws, I think I need a refresher course to help me cut through all the gray area here.

Police spokeswoman Elaine Driscoll said while the investigation is under way, officers Paul Durkin, a 26-year-veteran, who sources identified as the alleged shooter, and four-year veteran Joseph Behnke were placed on paid leave and stripped of their sidearms following Friday'’s suspension.

Shoot a cop, flee the scene, here's your check.

But, try to get an armed and dangerous drunk driver off the road, and get shot for your efforts, and it's "please turn in your gun". Nope, nothing to see here, folks, move along.

Of course, the story fails to mention if Officer Durkin's personal firearms have been taken from his home. Perhaps, they're still debating whether he's "suitable to be licensed". What say you, Sergeant Mosher?

OK, I know this is all S.O.P. And yes, I admit, there's still a chance that the "investigation" will actually lead to charges being brought forward in this case, as well they should be, by all accounts. But, it's right up there with the chance that the Sox will be calling me up to provide a little middle relief out of the bullpen.

As I'm wont to say, we shall see.


Michael Smerconish is on C-SPAN2's Book TV right now discussing his new book, Muzzled: From T-Ball to Terrorism - True Stories That Should be Fiction.

Description: In "Muzzled" radio talk show host Michael Smerconish describes today's culture as oversensitive. His latest book is a collection of short stories about living in a politically correct America.

From the reviews:

"In Muzzled, my American Blood Brother of status-quo-obliterating defiance, Michael Smerconish, once again smokes out the cockroaches of political correctness ... Muzzled is a great title for a book that I am convinced every American school kid should read and be tested on. If a new generation doesn't grow some intellectual balls, our Once Great Nation will continue to repeat horrific mistakes and pay the price ... Read it. Live it."

-Ted Nugent, rock star, author, television personality, and hunter extraordinaire

Works for me.


Dude, you totally suck at hunger striking.

Saddam Hussein ended a hunger strike after missing just one meal, a U.S. official said Friday.

AP Headline of the Day

Deaths of children in hot cars 'totally preventable,' experts say

You don't say.

Menino Sees the Light

Well, it's more like he got the light beaten into him.

But, hey, anything that can improve the quality of life for the people of Boston and make their mayor look like a bigger buffoon than he already shows himself to be on a regular basis, is what I call a win-win situation.

From the Boston Globe:

Menino agrees to use State Police
After criticism, OK's special role

Mayor Thomas M. Menino, amid an outcry from Boston city councilors and community leaders, said yesterday that he will accept an offer from Governor Mitt Romney to loan state troopers to Boston for special operations this summer.

Romney had offered the use of State Police as Boston's understaffed police force battles a wave of crime and heads into a summer that some fear will be the bloodiest in years. On Thursday, Menino said he had decided to refuse the help, largely because Boston's powerful police unions would oppose it.

But the mayor came under a firestorm of criticism yesterday, with city councilors and residents of some of the city's hardest-hit areas accusing him of letting politics interfere with the well-being of the neighborhoods.

Noooooo!!! Say it isn't so!

State troopers were brought in to aid Boston police on several occasions by Police Commissioner Kathleen M. O'Toole, who also used them to assist during the Democratic National Convention and in the Neighborhood Shield and Rolling Thunder operations.

But the use of outside forces angered Boston's police unions, which argued that it reduced opportunities for overtime within the Boston police force.

Some yesterday were upset that such calculations may have played a part in Menino's initial decision.

Note the appropriate use of the word "upset" - not "surprised", "shocked", "stunned", or "startled".

"Public safety is not and should not be a political partisan football, and it shouldn't be determined by who gets overtime," said Ginny Allen, founder of the North of Rossfield Crime Watch in Hyde Park. "It's the difference between life and death. Politicians need to put vanity and pride aside and provide the city with adequate police personnel to cope with the gunfire crisis. To do anything less is indefensible."

Welcome to Boston City Hall.

And, saving the best for last, the Boston Globe article closes with this money quote.

"I don't think police are the only answer," Menino said. "People are avoiding the real answer here. It's responsibility."

Do I even have to reply to that line of horseshit...again?

What a quack.

Friday, June 23, 2006

I'm Sorry

To my readers in the Greater Boston area, I am sorry.

Today at noon, I took the girls to Target and bought them the Six Flags Whale Animal Spray Pool to help then beat the heat this afternoon.

This torrential rain is all my fault.

I'm truly sorry.

(don't worry, I paid by Visa, not MumbleCard)

Pop Quiz: Compare and Contrast Edition


The victim stated while walking on Samuel Morse Way he was shot. The victim was transported to an area hospital and treated for non-life threatening gunshot wounds to his left flank and buttocks.

From the Boston Herald article blogged here:

The [Boston police officer] was attempting to leave the home when Behnke approached, telling him he was in no shape to drive and asking him to stay. The source said an argument ensued and the [officer] pulled his Glock .40-caliber semi-automatic, shooting Behnke in the hip.

Pop Quiz: Fill in the blank (I've narrowed your choices down to two to help you out some).

_________________ was arrested and charged with Assault with Intent to Murder, Assault and Battery by means of a Dangerous Weapon (gun), Assault by means of a Dangerous Weapon and Dangerous Weapons Unlawfully Carried.

(A) The Boston police officer
(B) A 15-year-old juvenile

On a related note: Has anyone heard anything from Menino's office regarding this incident? And what's Tom Reilly take on all of this? Will he be making any phone calls here to maintain his perfect record of obfuscating criminal investigations of his political allies?

After all, he's gonna need all the help Menino can give him if he's to have any chance of surviving the September primaries. So, I don't think ruffling the feathers of the Boston Police Patrolman's Union is something he's too keen on doing over the next couple of months.

Of course, should he choose to go after this cop and throw the book at him, not only would he be doing the right thing, from a moral standpoint, but he'd be doing the smart thing to get more voters of the ordinary-citizen persuasion lined up in his column this fall.

Unfortunately, as it turns out, doing the right and/or smart things has never exactly been Reilly's strong suit.

Puttin' the Dumb in Dumbass

Two years ago, I wrote about the Ashland (MA) Police Department's recent purchase of ten Bushmaster rifles, which the police said were necessary tools for defending the Town of Ashland against a terrorist attack.

Perhaps, that money would have been better spent teaching their kids about the works of Sir Isaac Newton.

When he realized the MBTA commuter train he was on was an express and not stopping at the Wellesley Hills station where he was bound, a 15-year-old from Ashland said he panicked and jumped off the train yesterday when it was traveling between 25 and 30 miles per hour.

Ouch...that's gonna leave a mark.

UPDATE: Here's my favorite quote from the article:

[Dumbass] also blamed the train's intercom system, which T officials said announced the express train, but which Todaro said he could not hear.

I'd say this kid has quite the future in Massachusetts politics.

Nothing New Here

Just more senseless gun crime in Boston.

A Boston police officer sent a .40-caliber round speeding through the hip of a fellow officer early yesterday morning in West Roxbury as the two argued over whether he was sober enough to drive, sources said.

Well, that puts that question to bed, anyway.

The injured cop, Officer Joseph Behnke, was taken to Brigham and Women'’s Hospital where he was treated and released for a non-life-threatening wound, police said.

The shooting capped a night of drinking by Boston cops that began on a boat docked off the Venizia in Dorchester, wound through more Dorchester bars and landed at Behnke'’s West Roxbury home, a high-ranking police source said.

The shooter was attempting to leave the home when Behnke approached, telling him he was in no shape to drive and asking him to stay. The source said an argument ensued and the shooter pulled his Glock .40-caliber semi-automatic, shooting Behnke in the hip.

"It's a disgrace," the source said. "For a cop to pull out his gun and shoot another cop is a disgrace. He should be locked up."

Yes, we all agree he should be locked up.

If I had spent the better part of the evening getting shit-faced and driving drunk around the city, while carrying a loaded gun, and then decided, at 4:30 in the morning, to shoot a cop who was trying to prevent me from driving any further, I suspect I'd be looking at some serious jail time.

But, then again, I'm just an ordinary citizen.

Why do I have the unsettling feeling we're about to see the latest episode of the "But, I'm the Victim Here" defense strategy - used most effectively in recent weeks by Rhode Island Congressman Patrick Kennedy - unfold here?

I hope I'm wrong, and this cop scumbag gets put away for a long, long time, just like one of us commonfolk would, given the same set of circumstances.

But I'm just not seeing that happening here.

I'm seeing a lengthy "investigation" on the horizon, the final write-up of which will likely contain the phrases "accidentally discharged", and "the gun, which Officer _______ believed to be unloaded, then went off", and one asshole cop submitting to drug and alcohol counseling in a union-approved method of job/pension/gun rights preservation - a nice little "get out of jail free" card, unavailable to us mere mortals.

Tell me I'm way off base here.


UPDATE: Northeast Shooters Forum member, Chris, provides this excellent tie-in to the above-mentioned story.

Boston Globe:

Mayor Thomas M. Menino declined an offer yesterday from Governor Mitt Romney to have State Police help bolster Boston's understaffed patrol force as it tries to stem a tide of crime.


No wonder Mumbles doesn't want State Troopers 'helping' out the Boston PD. They might just 'help' too much.


And, lest you think that Menino's declining of Romney's offer was based entirely on his need to protect his fragile, yet grossly over-inflated ego...

But Boston's police unions complained about involvement of outside help in those efforts, saying that Boston officers should be offered opportunities for overtime before officers from other law enforcement agencies are brought in, said Police Superintendent in Chief Al Goslin. The unions filed complaints against the department alleging unfair labor practices, Goslin said.

Yeah, that's what the BPD needs...more overtime opportunities.

"We're still in the process of defending against those," he said.

Well, while you're busy "defending" your own against those grave threats to the city's well-being, what say you let the State Police come in a start defending the good people of Dorchester and Roxbury from the armed thugs who have turned those neighborhoods into their personal shooting galleries?

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Abusing the First to Belittle the Second

I hadn't seen this U.S. News & World Report article until yesterday evening as I was perusing the month-old magazines in my chiropractor's waiting room. Forgive me for my belated posting of this.

Danielle Burton, writing about the National Rifle Association's 135th annual convention, held in Milwaukee last month, somehow managed to get her few functioning brain cells to fire in sequence and was able to squeeze this out from between her ears.

Conversation topics will almost certainly include the gun confiscations that occurred after Hurricane Katrina when police attempted to keep weapons away from looters, as well as the "Stand Your Ground" bills sweeping through many states.

Danielle, meet Patricia Konie, one of the "looters" you wrote about, and elderly woman who was body-slammed, disarmed, and then forcibly removed from her home by a gang of heavily armed agents of the state (of California!).

Note: link contains sidebar content NSFW. I'd link to an alternate source, but this is the most complete version of this video I could find. Be sure to listen to the voice-over by the newsfolk.

Here are some more viscous looters and thugs being stripped of their weapons and rounded up for "processing".

Yet, you felt compelled to report that the police merely "attempted" to take their firearms.

Yes, this is old news, but if anything bears repeating (and should be made mandatory viewing for all public school students in grades 4 and up), it's these real-life stories that show just how "paranoid" some of us are (not) when we talk about the true intentions of the "common-sense" "gun safety" movement in this country.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

It's All About the Guns (cont'd)

Via the Brockton Enterprise:

STOUGHTON — Two Porter Street men charged with the attempted slaying of a 17-year-old in a bloody attack with a meat cleaver...


...and a folding pocketknife...



...were each held on $100,000 cash bail Tuesday.

One of the suspects, Jose Ramirez, 22, of 173 Porter St., is also facing a second charge of attempted murder after police say he assaulted the other defendant, Willie Wilkerson, 20, also of 173 Porter St., with the meat cleaver.

"It was a wild scene," said police Sgt. Daniel McGowan. "It's shocking."

Hey! That's my line, pal!

And, from

There was a scare for customers and employees at a Braintree credit union Wednesday, when a woman walked in claiming to have a bomb.

The female robber demanded money from a clerk at the Telephone Workers Credit Union at the South Shore Plaza. She took the cash and fled – leaving a bag behind.

The bank was evacuated and the bomb squad was called to the scene.

Turns out, all that was inside the bag was a bunch of clothing.

Clearly, what's called for here is a wide-sweeping ban on the sale and possession of clothing.

Public nudity - it's FOR THE CHILDRENTM!

In Honor of the First Day of ...

"Summer" by Jabbering Trout

Wednesday's "One For the Ladies"

This 45-year-old would-be Romeo reveals in his personal ad that he's...

...6'2" single never married ...

I'm shocked.

No luck with the ladies? Try dressing like an adult for a change, and not some 12-year-old punk from Mattapan.

(hint: Dude, the visor of the hat goes in the front)

Maybe I Should Bring Back My Mullet

Just fixed the broken paper tray in the photocopier using two paperclips and a pair of pliers.

In case you missed it before.


While Massachusetts Attorney General Tom Reilly continues pandering to the illegal alien community, one of his opponents in the gubernatorial race, Chris Gabrieli is actually speaking out against Reilly, Governor Romney, and those contractors which are hiring illegal aliens to work on lucrative state construction contracts.

Democratic gubernatorial candidate Christopher F. Gabrieli, in some of his most extensive comments to date on immigration, blasted Governor Mitt Romney and Attorney General Thomas F. Reilly yesterday for allowing construction firms that employ illegal immigrants to win state contracts.

What's Gabrieli trying to do here? Become governor or something?

Gabrieli said people are outraged over a Globe story Sunday that detailed how contractors on several state-funded projects appear to have relied heavily on undocumented workers. Romney and Reilly both have said that immigration is largely a matter of federal law and that there is little they can do about it.

"I think it's disappointing when the people we elect to do this all have explanations that have to do with it [being] somebody's else's fault," Gabrieli said after unveiling an energy plan at a Quincy library. "I think these employers know what they're doing, and I think that they should not be rewarded by continuing to get state contracts."

Punishing illegal behavior. 'Round these parts, we call that "thinking outside the box".

Gabrieli's comments reflect the harder line on illegal immigration he's taken than his two Democratic opponents -- Reilly and Deval L. Patrick, a former civil rights prosecutor and executive with Texaco and the Coca-Cola Co . Unlike his rivals, for example, Gabrieli opposes allowing the children of undocumented immigrants to receive in-state tuition rates at public colleges.

At the rate Reilly's going, he'll be lucky to come out of the primary this September with a bronze medal around his neck. I think it's time for a new campaign poster.

Any ideas?

UPDATE: Not my best effort to-date, but here you go.

(click for larger image)

What's Wrong With This Picture?

...and, why is the Boston Globe so often the subject of discussion here when I use that post title?

So, anyone getting his or her dose of daily news from this morning will be greeted with this headline. Nothing out of the ordinary, right?

Well, here's what the folks walking by the newsstands will get today.

"But, maybe there simply wasn't enough room to squeeze the word 'illegal' in there."


That wouldn't exactly explain how they managed to make "Taxpayers face leap in governor's travel costs" fit nicely at the top of the next story down on the page.

So, not only do they run with the blatantly biased headline, but they do so with a typeface size one would expect to see for a story about a long overdue Red Sox world championship or the sudden death of a head of state.

And, for the record, here's the headline for that story as it appeared on this morning.

Nope. No bias there. Move along.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

This Just In!

Some heroin bad for you.

PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) - Heroin users should avoid the drug because some supplies have been tainted with a powerful painkiller blamed for hundreds of deaths nationwide since mid-April, law enforcement officials urged on Tuesday.

The remaining supplies have been declared safe for use, seeing as they're only contaminated with a highly-addictive, and potentially lethal, opiate.

Blood For Odin!!!

From Clayton Cramer (via a "friend of a friend"):

A friend of a friend lives in NYC and participates in the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism). He's stereotypical Viking, 6'7" tall, LONG blonde hair, about 350 - 400 lbs of solid muscle, and looks every bit of it.

Well, he was going to a meet in full getup with long cloak and battle axe and sitting on the subway... hunched over leaning on the axe with the cloak pulled over it so he wouldn't scare anybody.

Lo and behold some little punk comes up... MAYBE 5'2", 120 lbs soaking wet, and brandishes a knife saying "GIMME YOUR MONEY!"


You know the drill...RTWT.

To the Woodshed ... and Beyond!

Bitter has her way (ewww...not like that!) with Washington Post columnist David Ignoramus Ignatius, and it's not pretty ... from his perspective, anyway.

Globe Announces Gov. Race Endorsement

Well, not exactly.

They didn't go so far as to endorse the candidacy of any individual candidate. But if this article doesn't constitute an anti-endorsement, coming in the months leading up to the primary election, then I don't know what would. If the powers-that-be at the Boston Globe had any interest in endorsing Tom Reilly for Governor, there's simply no way they would have run this story.

Reilly reiterates stance on workers

Attorney General Thomas F. Reilly said yesterday it is not his responsibility to crack down on Massachusetts employers that hire undocumented immigrants, and he said he will continue his policy of taking no action against the companies.

And, what is his "policy", you ask?

In 2001, Reilly established a policy, saying his office would aggressively fight for the rights and wages of immigrant workers, legal or not, and promise not to report them to federal authorities.

He also said he would enforce wage and labor laws against companies, but not act against them for employing undocumented immigrants.

But, he wasn't running for Governor back in 2001. That was eons ago, in political terms. Surely, his position has conveniently evolved (read: flipped) since then, right? I mean, he's got voters to woo, now.

Yesterday he stood by that, even as a Globe story Sunday reported that undocumented immigrants were receiving wages from contractors on state-funded projects.

Guess not. But, hey, who cares if illegal aliens are committing identity theft and document fraud, while taking high-paying jobs away from American citizens? It's not like it's a bad least, according to would-be governor dog catcher, Tom Reilly here.

"In terms of immigration policy, that is the responsibility of the federal government, not the responsibility of the state government," Reilly said.

Well, shit, no wonder Mumbles "Pass the Buck" Menino loves this guy.

Let's read on, shall we? I'm sensing a money quote on the horizon.

A Massachusetts law states, in part: "It shall be unlawful for any employer knowingly to employ any alien in the Commonwealth ... who has not been admitted to the United States for permanent residence, except those who are admitted under a work permit."

Here's a new campaign slogan for you.

Tom Reilly for Governor
Waving the white flag, so you don't have to.

Goes nicely with this one, I must say.

Enjoy your new home in the Land of Political Irrelevance come November September, Tom. You've earned it.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Quote of the Day - Bizarro World Edition

State Senator Jarrett Barrios, speaking on the Scott Allen Miller Show (680AM-WRKO) this morning about his crusade to limit the frequency with which public schools can serve Fluffernutters for lunch (more on that later, if I feel like it).

"...I'm a libertarian."

I nearly swerved into a field after hearing that.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Happy Father's Day

Emphasis on "happy".

Nothing out of the ordinary - t-shirts, sock, and underwear.

And this (updated w/ better pic):

Just one question - would this now be a "cache" or an "arsenal"?

Saturday, June 17, 2006

File Under: Count Your Blessings

Menino Promoting Peace In Hip-Hop Video

Mayor Tom Menino will make a cameo in a new hip-hop video shooting in Boston this weekend. The "Start Peace" video is shooting all weekend in Boston neighborhoods, to promote peace on the streets.


During last weekend's video shoot, Mayor Menino showed up. We're told he doesn't dance or rap in the video – simply flashes the peace sign.

Obligatory Photoshop follow-up...

Friday, June 16, 2006

Defining "Success"

So, the Boston Police Department and the Mayor's Office have already declared their latest gun buyback program a success, only four days into its four-week run.

From the latest Media Advisory released 6/15/06:

WHAT: ClearChannel Outdoor has teamed up with Mayor Menino, the Boston Police Department and members of the community to heighten awareness for the 2006 Boston Gun Buyback, "“Aim For Peace"”. This event will unveil the first of thirty billboards to be located around the city. Participants will also share information related to the program'’s increasing success. Many of the 127 guns collected will be on display.

From this posting dated 6/15/06:

The new Boston Gun Buyback Program is off to a strong start. As of this morning (June 14,2006), we have collected 100 firearms turned into police and community drop-off locations. As a result of the program'’s success, funds for gift cards are running low. This is a "“call to action"” for local corporations to join our efforts to decrease youth violence and take guns off the streets of Boston.

And, from this item on

[Boston Police Deputy Superintendent Darrin] Greeley says, because of the program's success, they may run out of gift cards by the end of Wednesday.

Now, from the get-go, the stated purpose of the gun buyback was to "get the guns off the streets" in order to cut down on the city'’s gun violence.

However, since the gun buyback program began, a mere four days ago, the city has seen multiple gun possession arrests and gun-related homicides, including this fatal shooting earlier today in Hyde Park.

About 12:25am this morning, officers from District 18 responded to a call for shots fired at 1 Rosa Street. Upon arrival officers located a victim inside of a motor vehicle suffering from multiple gun shot wounds. The victim was transported to an area hospital, where he later succumbed to his injuries.

It seems they're jumping the gun (no pun intended) here in declaring this buyback program a "success".

Unless, of course, the actual goal of the program has nothing to do with reducing the violent crime rate, and everything to do with creating a photo op for the politicians involved who now get to pose in front of conference room tables covered with "violent guns", thereby creating the illusion that they've taken positive steps toward reducing gun violence in the city.

Now, if the presentation of this feel-good facade was the intended goal of the gun buyback, then by all means, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED, Mr. Mayor!

I gotta ask, though, if the numbers come in at the end of the year, and show a marked increase in the amount of gun violence in the city, compared to 2005 where the city hit a 10-year-highin its homicide rate, will these glowing declarations of "success" be retracted and will the gun buyback program be called to the carpet as the cheap publicity stunt many of us had known it to be all along?

Yeah, I don't think so either.

Dumbass of the Day

Presented without commentary.

Officer's submachine gun stolen at game

DETROIT --A suburban police officer left a submachine gun in his unmarked vehicle while he attended a baseball game downtown, and returned to find it stolen, police said Thursday.

The narcotics officer from Oakland County's West Bloomfield Township left the weapon covered in the back seat of his Jeep while he attended a Detroit Tigers game Wednesday night at Comerica Park, West Bloomfield Police Chief Ron Cronin told local TV stations.

"He gets an `A' for stupidity in this case," Cronin said of the officer, whom he did not identify. "You can bet he's gonna be disciplined."

OK, maybe just a little commentary.

What a MORON!

What a FUCKING moron!

What a goddamn unbelievably bone-headed, fucking moron!!!

And, of course, I'm sure he'll be "disciplined" just as harshly as you or I would be for doing the same thing, right? Yeah...don't bet the house on it.

"...but some animals or more equal than others."

UPDATE: More here.

A West Bloomfield Police officer who took a department car and sub-machine gun to a Detroit Tigers game Wednesday night is under investigation.

Well, you certainly can't blame him for wanting to have a weapon with him in the crime-free city of Detroit. I know I would.

Between 8-10 p.m., as the officer attended the game, someone broke into the undercover car as it sat parked on Woodward and stole a 9 mm Colt SMG sub-machine gun from the back seat along with some ammunition, said Detroit Police Sgt. Omar Feliciano.

The gun is Colt's lightweight version of the M-16 rifle, according the gunmaker's Web site. It will fire all standard 9 mm bullets and is designed for close fights.

Yeah, I'll just stick that under a blanket on my back seat. What's the worst that could happen?

The West Bloomfield officer -- who both police departments declined to name -- is a three-year veteran.

OK, what's wrong with that sentence?

As a member of a special response team, he is expected to be on 24-hour alert, said West Bloomfield Township Lt. Carl Fuhs. The officer in theory should have his firearm nearby at all times, Fuhs said.

"Obviously we are not happy about this," Fuhs said. "He probably should not have left it in the back seat."


Here's where the story starts to smell like week-old cod.

When Detroit officers responded to the theft, the West Bloomfield officer declined to have the vehicle impounded or checked for fingerprints, Feliciano said.

Yeah, woudn't want to do that - might help the police catch catch your accomplice the guy.

Fuhs said his department will investigate the loss of the West Bloomfield gun and Police Chief Ronald D. Cronin will decide if a disciplinary action is needed.


That grinding sound you just heard was the wheels of justice coming to a slow, painful stop.

UPDATE II: Quote of the Day

This gem comes from reader Eric, via the comments to this post.

It seems the idiot who left his machine gun in the back seat isn't the only cop walking the streets of West Bloomfield, Michigan severely wanting in the clue department.

"The people who took it probably didn't even know it was a gun," said [West Bloomfield police chief Ronald] Cronin.

Your weekend homework assignment is to scroll up to the picture above, and tell me what else that object could possibly be mistaken for.

A novelty salt saker, perhaps?

Maybe, a canoe paddle?

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Mumbling On

From the Boston Globe:

Mayor seeks help from hospitals on violence

City officials huddled this morning with leaders of Boston's hospitals to seek their help responding to the spike in Boston's gun violence.

Menino wants the hospitals in Boston to do more??? I'd say their response to Boston's gun violence has been nothing less than phenomenal.

The fact that Boston Medical Center, the largest 24-hour Level 1 trauma center in New England, is in such close proximity to the neighborhoods where most of the shootings are taking place is the main reason the death rate for gunshot victims in Boston is as low as it is today.

Imagine what the fatality rate for gunshot and stabbing wounds would be in the city if EMT's had to make a 30-minute drive (both ways) to transport victims to the nearest community "hospital". Or if all the shooting victims in Boston had to be flown by chopper to Portland, Maine for emergency surgery.

Mayor Thomas M. Menino and the city's Public Health Commission want medical centers to provide more services to victims of violence and their families and to start programs to prevent youth violence.

Not that I should have to repeat myself, but if you want to prevent youth violence...LOCK UP VIOLENT YOUTHS!

Personally, I'd look for assistance in this department from our politicians, police, prosecutors, and judges. But, unfortunately, we've had the displeasure of seeing what a bang up job they've been doing for us, as of late. The way I see it, Mumbles must have had his list narrowed down to post offices, nail salons, hospitals, and muffler shops.

Hospitals seemed like the next logical step, I guess.

At the Parkman House meeting, Menino noted that minorities make up a disproportionate number of victims.

Oh, yeah? Well, they also make up a disproportionate percentage of the violent scumbag population in the city. You know, the people who are actually doing all the shooting and stabbing here. But, then again, addressing the actual problem has never been the mayor's strong suit. It's so much easier, after all, to blame it all on the guns (and t-shirts, pay phones, etc.).

For instance, while African Americans are about one-fourth of the city's population, they are nearly three-fourths of gunshot victims. Also, 80 percent of gunshot and stabbing victims live in six heavily minority neighborhoods, the city says.

What is it exactly that Menino's expecting the hospitals to do? Start letting more white gunshot victims die to balance out the numbers a little?*

"This is unacceptable, and it affects us all," Menino said in a statement.

Yeah, it affects the people of Dorchester and Roxbury, in that they might get mugged, beaten, stabbed, raped, or killed on their way home from work. It affects you, Mr. Mayor, in that your poll numbers might start to decline as a direct result thereof.

Same difference, right?

*That's called a "joke", people. I don't think that's what the mayor has in mind here. Now, it might be, but I don't think so.

Wednesday's "One For the Ladies"

What's this week's Casanova looking for?

Someone who thinks there is more to life than making babies, working and dying.

You know, the more important things in life - like sitting on your Mom's couch flashing "gang signs", while trying to look cool wearing your sunglasses indoors.

I'm the lead singer of my band.

Where was this picture of him and his "band" taken, do you suppose?

(A) Avalon
(B) Tweeter Center
(C) Johnny D's
(D) Parents' basement

And, again, there's that cool "gang sign" that just drives the chicks wild. You better act fast to scoop this one up, ladies.

UPDATE: See Derek's comment for the "sign language" translation.

Does Menino Know About This?

Because, it's only a matter of time before Maine's lax gargoyle laws start to take their toll on the good people of Boston.

ELLSWORTH, Maine --A retired mathematics professor who was found dead in her Mount Desert Island home in January was beaten to death with a ceramic gargoyle after a dispute over money, according to court documents.

As of the writing of this post, there is no age limit, licensing, or criminal background check required for the purchase and possession of ceramic gargoyles. It should also be noted that these high-tech ceramic weapons can be easily passed through airport security metal detectors.

All I'm asking for here is some "common sense" gargoyle safety laws. Because - let's face the facts, folks - no one needs a ceramic gargoyle.


Again, I'm Shocked!

From the Associated Press:

BOSTON --Federal authorities say nine people have been arrested on charges they sold fake US identification documents, including social security and green cards.

US Attorney Michael Sullivan says a newly created task force made the arrests over the last week in Framingham, Hull, Lawrence, Malden, Medford, and Worcester.

Sullivan says the people arrested allegedly manufactured and sold sets of documents ranging in price from $120-$200.

All of the nine defendants are in the US illegally.

The US attorney says in addition to the nine defendants, authorities broke up six counterfeit document labs.

One of the suspects had been making ten sets of false documents a day for five years.

Let's do the math. And, for the sake of argument, let's assume these "hard working" individuals, while "playing the rules" (Ted Kennedy's words, not mine), took weekends off.

Ten sets of bogus documents a day = $1,200 to $2,000.

Over the course of five years = $1,560,000 to $2,600,000 - TAX FREE! And that's just for ONE of the suspects arrested here.

But, don't sweat it, dude. You're more than welcome to stay here in America to pursue your dreams. After all, you're only here to manufacture and sell the fake documentation that Americans citizens can't be bothered manufacturing and selling.

But, I have to warn you, we're really cracking down these days on your type. First, you'll have to pay a "penalty" of $2,000. Now, we realize two million thousand dollars is a lot of money for you poor, destitute types. Would you like us to help you set up a payment plan for that?

Also, we're going to insist that you pay back taxes on a whopping 60% of that ill-gotten income. It's only "fair". And, we're all about the fairness here in the US Senate. did declare that as earned income, right?

OK, now that we've gotten that financial "penalty" phase out of the way, we just need to run a criminal background check on each of you.

Do you have any ID?


OK, continuing with our little the math exercise...

Ten sets of false documents a day for five years = 13,000 illegals* walking around with bogus US identification documents (SSN, green cards, etc.) - from just this one guy alone! To anyone who thinks the immigration plan put forth by the US Senate is even remotely enforceable, the floor is yours.

Educate me, please.

* can't very well call them "undocumented" now, can we?

Mark Your Calendars

Had I known ahead of time that today was to be declared Kim’s Anti-United Nations Rant Day, I'd have baked a cake, or brought streamers, or something.

Instead, I'll just offer up a hearty "what he said".

Perhaps, a large-scale ammunition purchase is in order today to mark the occasion.

I Hate Illinois Food Nazis

These people give douchebags a bad name.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A U.S. consumer group sued the operator of the KFC fried chicken restaurant chain on Tuesday to try and force it to stop frying foods in an artery-clogging fat.

And unfortunately, much like herpes, they never really go away.

Money quote:

CSPI Executive Director Michael Jacobson said it was harder to avoid trans fat at KFC than at other fast-food restaurants.

Here's a novel approach for you, Michael.


That is all.

(previous post on this no-good, meddling assmonkey here)

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Gun Control Invades Baghdad

At long last, the members of the congressional delegation from Massachusetts, and the rest of the liberal left in this country, finally have something to point to as an example of "progress" being made in the war in Iraq.

BAGHDAD, June 13 -- Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki's month-old government rolled out its first major initiative against violence on Tuesday, announcing tighter crackdowns in the capital city in an attempt to combat the killing and kidnapping.

The plan imposes curfews from roughly dusk to dawn each day and prohibits cars from moving on the streets for four hours during midday on Fridays, when many Muslims attend prayers in mosques. Residents will not be allowed to carry guns outside their homes, and more patrols and checkpoints are planned to raise the visibility of the military.

Yeah, that'll work. Because if there's one thing that blood-thirsty, Islamo-fuckface terrorists are really good at, it's obeying rules and regulations.

"People are carrying guns in the streets. How do we know if they are terrorists?" Maj. Gen. Abdul Aziz Muhammed-Jassim, operations director of the general command of the Iraqi forces, said at a news conference at the Defense Ministry on Tuesday.

Here's one way to find out, Abdul.

Ban the carrying of guns in public, and the folks who continue to do so, with complete disregard for the rule of law, shooting up busloads of civilians all the while, will be the terrorists.

It's not rocket (-propelled grenade) science.